One Christian Mom

Hey, all!

2012-02-15T14:47:00.001-05:00

Still goin round two of the sickies around here. My son has been out of school a few days now, and today I feel like I have a sinus infection going on.

That on top of the fact that I finally today got caught up on laundry, work and the kitchen makes it a not-so-bad day.

But forgive me if I am not up to my usual writer's self.

Hopefully I will be back up and running soon (like, tomorrow!)

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Again? Really??

2012-02-12T19:09:00.002-05:00

My middle guy has a fever. He was at his dad's house and his dad called me and said, "Buddy has a fever, what can I give him?" I have to say, he handled it well. I asked if he had tried a cool bath and some other non-medication solutions, which he had. So I recommended children's tylenol. Instead of dragging the kids out to get it, he asked a neighbor, who had some. Thankfully they got to spend the day together yesterday because I was told he was out of commission most of today. Please pray with me that he is feeling better, like, now. :) I hate to see my little ones sick.

Yesterday we had the first leader's meeting for the Celebrate Recovery that I am a leader for. Did I write about that already? I don't think I did. That is exactly why we needed a leader's meeting. My scatterbrainedness is starting to effect the ministry. I have so many things going on right now, that I needed help. I have leaders. That's what they are there for. So we delegated. I feel so relieved. And they feel so wonderful to help :) All works out for His greater Glory!!!

Anyway, that's all for now. Gotta get some broth in the kid :)

God's blessings on your day!
One Christian Mom

Time, Oh Where Art Thou?

2012-02-10T09:08:00.002-05:00

These days (who am I kidding? Okay, almost all the time) I struggle with time management. I think I always have, but when the kids were home, I had nothing but time and so it didn't seem so bad, because there was always tomorrow.

However, when they are in school and you are supposed to be spending your time earning, things get different. Don't get me wrong - homeschool and homemaking ARE work. However, now I feel like I have two jobs. The one I earn money for, and the one I earn eternal rewards for. :)

So time management becomes an issue because when I am "at work" (I work from home, so "at work" constitutes once the kids are on the bus) I should be working. When the kids are home, I am helping with homework (read: homeschooling, LOL), cooking dinner, having family time, baths, sometimes helping a neighbor with childcare so their kid doesn't have to go to daycare (one of the many benefits of working from home), etc. Then there's church 2 nights a week.

The kids have a rotating schedule with their dad, the average is two weekends with me and two with him. But sometimes I have them for three and sometimes I have them for one. Just depends on his work schedule. I am working with him for the kid's benefit. But it does make time management difficult.

So when is the time for laundry, dishes, floors, sheets, showers, me time? Me time? What's that? HAHAHAHA. Truth be told, I will HAVE to find some. All that other stuff does get done eventually. Switching wash while dinner is simmering. Emptying the dishwasher while the kids are doing homework independently. Having them help me fold clothes. Putting away laundry while they are in the bath (they are old enough, don't worry :) )

But me time? No. They go to bed, I finish up chores, stoke the fire stove, sometimes shower, and go to bed. Then we do it all again tomorrow. But I am finding that not only do I need the mind refresher, I need exercise.

You see, I think I had mentioned this before, but I struggle with depression. Now, it's not nearly as bad as it used to be. Celebrate Recovery has helped me with that, along with my church, church family, family and friends. I have a wonderful support system. But the other day, I started crying, and I couldn't stop. Thank God for a wonderful neighbor who also happens to go to my church. I dropped my son off with her and she sat and prayed with me a while. Then she let me go home by myself. I did some work, but I also was able to read the bible and just sit by myself with no noise, no distractions. I needed that.

Doctors say (don't you love that phrase?) that exercise can help with depression. Although I feel refreshed, I am not out of the woods yet. The tears are gone, but the ominous feeling still comes and goes. Food plays a big part... and the more unnatural stuff I get out of my system, the better I feel. Sugar and other sugary products like fructose and the like are big triggers.

But the exercise component is missing. So now to carve out time for that. Where do you find time to exercise?

With God's blessings on your day!
One Christian Mom

Family Fun Day

2012-02-08T17:30:00.000-05:00

Thankfully, the sickies seem to have left. All that's left is this extreme exhaustion on my part. My kids have been well since about a day or two since that last post. I, however, am another story. While the kids were sick, I kinda let myself go. I wasn't eating right, and I didn't realize I hadn't been taking my thyroid medication. So, I got tired. And exhausted. And irritable. And, and, and. Let's just say it wasn't pretty.

So almost a week ago I realized it, and I started taking my meds again, and started trying to eat right. I think its a cycle. You start to feel yucky, and you don't feel like cooking or cleaning or whatever. Then you feel even yuckier, and you eat worse and, well, I just needed to stop it in it's tracks. So my body is still recovering from all that. But it's getting better every day. It's amazing what food can do for or to you, depending on what kind of foods you are putting into your body (or not putting in it, for that matter!

So now for the topic of the day... family fun day! The kids are off of school today, teacher in-service day. So this morning, the kids were told that if they help me clean up around here, we can all go do something fun together. I have been trying to do this with them once a week, and I have usually been succeeding. Last week we didn't, but they were at their dad's house. Other than that, we have been trying to make it a habit.

So today, the first order of business was to get the house cleaned up. This is no small feat, because as we are cleaning one room, the little guy is trying to trash another. So it took way longer than I would have liked, and I didn't get any extra stuff done, like dishes or laundry. LOL Just the toys. So later I will have to do all of that.

Then, we went to a friend's house for lunch. My kids hardly ever have time for play dates between my work schedule and their school and "going to daddy's" schedule. So this is a treat. Afterwards, we went bowling with two other families. They LOVED it.

Still on the agenda is the movie we got when we went to the library. I am making dinner, and we will take out the TV trays and watch while we eat. I never allow this, so it's fun time :) Then I will make sure they get some good snuggle and book time. Bed will be early, as they have to go to school in the morning.

What does your family do to break up the monotony?
God's blessings on your day!
One Christian Mom

Sickies

2012-01-24T11:31:00.002-05:00

Wow, we have been having a bout of sickies in my house. First my daughter a few weeks ago got a stomach bug (and for those of you who know me or have been following me for any length of time know, that could be disastrous). Thankfully it turned out to only last a few days, and she only lost a pound from it, which she has since gained back.

Then, a few days ago, I got sick. Again. Seems like I am always sick these days. Maybe it's the stress, who knows? Anyway, a stomach bug to be sure. Not fun. Achy, nauseous (with results), fatigued, et cetera. Got. Nothing. Done. You all know how that goes!

Then yesterday, my son gets sick. At 2:30 in the morning. And 3:15, and 4:00, and 5:30, and, and, and. It finally stopped around 10:30 a.m. A friend took my daughter to school and another picked up my other son to play at her house for the day. I know, I have such wonderful friends, don't I?

Thankfully he is better today, but still... Got. Nothing. Done. You all know how it goes.

So today is "clean up the aftermath" day. There is no work today (I should really write another work post, but that's for another day.) Can you all tell my flakiness is in full force today? LOL Comes from having the sickies in my house!

So far, I picked up the mail, got the kitchen clean enough (which will just have to be enough!), had breakfast (which is an improvement for me, still nauseous and dizzy), got the coal stove cleaned out (it really needed it), and am ready to sit for a bit (which is why I am blogging :) )

I hope to get laundry folded and at least one more load done, and get the toys in the living room put away, sweep and vacuume in there. That should pretty much take all the energy I have left. Then tomorrow, I will clean the bathroom (I promise!)

Glad to be back to blogging :)

God Bless.

One Christian Mom

Not So Emotional

2011-10-19T16:49:00.003-04:00

Well, I have finally gotten (I know it's not a word, but I'm using it anyway.) :) I have finally gotten to a point where I can be a bit less emotional about sending my kids to school. A lot has happened since that last post, but I have just not been able to write a post without letting all the emotions get in the way. So here's a run-down of what has transpired. I am going to categorize it for my own thought-process, it's just easier.

WORK:
I have been rejected by a lot - a lot of companies. Mostly on the grounds of not having the right equipment or the right number of years of experience. So far, no companies I have directly interviewed with have rejected me, but there are some I have yet to hear from. I applied with a lot - I mean really a lot of companies.

I have been hired by, well, let's see. I have been hired by I think 4 total? Yes, 4 so far. I am in process for a 5th, but that is yet to be decided, if I have the right experience. I am working in transcription. I had done transcription in a small capacity in the past many years ago. Being I had done that, and I am still in contact with that employer, he gave me a reference for that. So I was able to apply with transcription companies for general and legal transcription. I cannot, nor do I want to do medical transcription.

Anyway, most of these companies pay peanuts. That is why I am not listing them here. I am grateful for them giving me the opportunity, but really, it's not anywhere near enough. Most pay around $10 per audio hour, an audio hour taking between three and four hours to complete. One company even pays $6 per audio hour. But it's steady work.

One company pays $13 per audio hour, but the work is not steady. Sometimes there's work and sometimes there's not any. When there is, you have to be available at the time it comes in, or they give it to the next person. Between kids getting off the bus at a certain time to mom's doctor's appointments, I haven't been able to work with them as much as I would like.

The last company I was hired with is great - $55 per audio hour. However, the work is slip. One 15 or 20 minute file every few days. So I am not totally making a living as of yet.

Here's the problem - one of the reasons for all the emotions as of late. I put my kids in school so I could make a living - so I could make enough money for us to live off of, and now they're in school, and I am making, on average - well, let's just say not enough. I know that will change - I pray that will change. But as for right now, it's not enough.

MOM:
My mom's health is not good. She has headaches almost constantly. She is forgetting - well, everything. Her arthritis is getting worse, and now they say she has bursitis as well. They are talking early onset Alzheimer's for the memory problems, and that scares me - really scares me. So we are at the doctors a lot. I mean really a lot. LOL I seem to say that a lot lately, I mean, really a lot! Haha. I have to laugh at myself. Anyway, specialists, testing, primary care, med regs, phys therapy, more specialists. On average once or twice a week we are at the doctors. Please pray for her.

SCHOOL:
The kid's school is going okay. Nothing wonderful, but then again, I knew that. my son is doing better than average, but they can't move him up because of his age. They won't put him in "gifted" because his IQ isn't sufficiently elevated over the other students. I told the teacher that was because he has already done Kinder, we were starting first grade with him this year. So she is working with him one-on-one throughout the day when she has time, and sending home more individualized work for him to do at home. I appreciated that.

My daughter is doing okay as well. She isn't making a whole lot of friends, she wants to be them, and she doesn't like their behavior all at the same time. I guess she wants to be included but doesn't want to go against her faith either. Academically, she's right where she was at home. Math and reading are good, writing and spelling not so good. They don't do history or science, but we have been continuing that at home. Tell me what is the point of sending them to school when you still have to teach them at home? It's like a giant day-care sometimes.

The bus: Well, I don't much like the bus, but the kids have had to learn to stand up for themselves, and to speak up to authority when they are being picked on. They were picked on a lot in the beginning, but now they finally told the bus driver and he noticed it happening, so he put a stop to it. The other kids ridicule my kids for standing up for themselves by telling the bus driver, but better than than live in fear of these bullies trying to steal their shoes and coats. Yes, in grammar school. It apparently only happens on the bus, but it's ridiculous.

Everything Else:
Everything else is basically nothing. There's no time. They get on the bus by 8:30, and they get off at 4:30. We do homework, dinner, bath and bed. Weekends, every other weekend is mine, just for me and the kids. The first weekend of the month their father comes to see them here for a few hours. The third weekend of the month he takes them to his house for the weekend.

That's it for now. I am sure I will think of something else I have wanted to tell you later, but if I do I will make another post :) I will try to get on here more often and keep you all updated, but sometimes I just don't want to type anymore! LOL

God Bless,
One Christan Mom

School Days

2011-09-20T11:52:00.002-04:00

Well, I have had to do something I swore I would never do. I have registered my kids for school. They start Thursday. Now before you go an comment, I am not going to be receptive of comments trying to sway me back, or comments bashing the school system, or comments asking me why I would ever do such a thing. Encouragement, prayer, etc are welcome, even if you want to pray for me to bring them back home is fine, but please no negative comments. So now, the story.

I am going to have to work. I realize this. I have been hired by several transcription companies in a work-from-home capacity. There are several problems. The first is that in order to make enough money to support us, I have to work more hours than I have left in a day after homeschool. The second is that while I am working, the kids are running rampant, watching tv and playing computer, making so much noise I cannot hear through the headphones. Yet another is that the kids aren't learning from me because I am worried and not focusing on keeping them focused. They are just too young to be self-motivated.

I have had family members say things like, "Thank goodness you finally made the right choice," and "I wondered when you were finally going to do that," and my favorite, "Now the kids will get the education they deserve." So you can see why I don't want any more negative comments. My church and friends are being supportive - understanding (or at least saying they understand, anyway) that I want to homeschool but can't, and sharing their good public school stories with me.

I went and registered them today, and they seem excited. They want to make new friends, they want to ride the bus. They are worried about having to sit in a chair all day, and about whether or not the teacher will teach them the way they can learn (I know, maybe I taught them about learning styles a little too early in life!) :) All-in-all, we are calling it a trial. If I can work while they are at school and if they are learning, and if the school works with them to "integrate" them comfortably, we will continue. But if it doesn't work out, then I will just have to figure out something else.

I am not going the day-care route. I have been "burned" twice now from that. One of the stories is up on the blog, the other is much more simple. I watched a boy for 2 weeks, never received any payment, and when I told the mom to pay or not bring the boy, she stopped bringing him. It wasn't enough money to live on, anyway. I can't afford before/after care to go work outside the home, and my mom needs me at home anyway. So I am going to try this telecommuting thing. The nice thing about it is it is waiting for me. There are always files available. I don't have to work when I can't - like today having to go register the kids, and now with the excitement I probably won't be able to start until Thursday. But on Thursday, I can start up like I never stopped. Work is on a first come, first served basis, so I will log on before I go to the bus stop to get my work, maybe even earlier. Then when I get back, I can do the work and submit and wait for more. :)

Anyway, thanks for encouraging me through my journey to this point, and I pray you will continue to do so. I have come to love my bloggy friends, and respect you all as if I have been sitting in your living room chatting over a cup of coffee, rather than over a computer screen.

God Bless,
One Christian Mom

Normalcy

2011-08-31T11:32:00.002-04:00

I just want things to go back to normal. The old normal - like the way things were before I met her a year ago. Actually, that's not true. I have grown so much since then, so much has happened since then. To go back would be robbing myself of all I have learned, all the growth, all the positive change.
I really just don't want to think about it anymore. I don't want to talk about it anymore. The problem with that is, the incident (as seen in the post directly below - if you haven't read that yet, this post won't make sense) causes a slope of other events that have not yet come to completion. The woman is currently in the hospital for a mandatory 72 hour evaluation. After that time, she could be forced to stay, or they could release her. At that point, there is no way to judge what her next move will be. First of all, we will never know when she gets out. Secondly, we don't know if she is going to try to get to me after that. Will she come here? Will she attend church functions? Will I have to confront her? I will never know. I feel as if I took the cowards way out, having not spoken with her directly when she came to my house, however I also feel like if I talked to her, she would try to keep me under manipulation. I need to not have contact with her.
The other thing that has yet to be resolved is my financial status. Without the income she provided me, I have no chance at paying all my bills. I know God will provide, but how?
I just don't want to think on these things anymore, but I don't know how. I know God will care for me. I know he will give me words to speak if she were to confront me. I know God will proved financially. But not knowing leads me to think about it a lot.
For the time being, we are trying to get back to normal. This morning, we did our chores, ate breakfast, washed, brushed and are currently doing school. I am not going to let this affect me adversely for any more time. We already lost two days of our life to this.
Here's the biggest problem. My mom is still partially in shock. She has a massive headache (not uncommon for her, but the ones brought on by stress are the worst.) She still shakes from time to time, and she gets cold without warning. I wanted to bring her in to the hospital, but she is afraid to go - afraid that we might see her there, even though that's not a possibility. We are living with locked doors and closed curtains. I don't like living in fear. I want to know that I know that if we were to see her again, I could act like an adult, tell her our friendship and business relationships were not healthy, and that I would not be interested in continuing them. I want to know that I know that at that point, no one will suffer any ill will.
Oh well. I know that is not a possibility. So for now, we wait and pretend to be normal.
God Bless!
One Christian Mom

You Can't Make This Stuff Up...

2011-08-30T09:02:00.003-04:00

That's what we had been saying all day yesterday, as the events of the day unfolded. You see, I had a friend who had some mental instability. You all "met" her the day after she spent a week at my house (post below). I know now that it was the beginning of the end. I really thought that she wanted my friendship. I thought that she just had some mental issues that she was trying to resolve (don't we all from time to time?) Hers were just stronger than anything I have ever experienced.
I try not to judge. I found myself thinking negative thoughts about her, and then repenting of them, never telling anyone about them because I thought I was wrong. Apparently, what I didn't know is that she is not only mentally unstable, but a habitual manipulator, and I was the object of manipulation.
Over time, she became more and more obsessed with me. She wanted to spend all of her free time with me, which affected not only myself and my family, but her family as well. Sometimes her free time and her husband's would co-inside and she would come over my house to "get away from him". I started to notice this destructive pattern, and I let her know I was going to back away from her a bit -I told her I would hang out with her only when we had it pre-planned.
That was my first mistake. I should have broke it off there and then. She started calling me to make plans for the next day at 10pm when she found out her husband had off work the following day. She would call me, tell me she was in my neck of the woods, and that she had something for me and was coming over.
I used to babysit her kids. She would call me and say there was no one to watch them, so I had to come pick them up and bring them to my house. When I refused, she would bring them with a suitcase and drop them off and leave them here for 2 days at a time. I kept them because I knew they were better off at my house anyway, but I now realize that was also a wrong decision.
Anyway, so two days ago the real trouble started. I had already let her know I was ending the friendship. She sent me a dissertation-sized email all about all the wrong I have done to her, and how all she did was give-give-give and all I did was take-take-take.
About an hour or so after she sent the email, she called me telling me I needed to increase my babysitting hours. I said no, that I wanted a firm schedule. She started yelling at me, which is when I hung up. She emailed, and texted me some nasty comments, which is when I decided I would no longer be watching her kids at all. I was out, and decided that I would tell her when I got home.
When I did arrive home, there were several nasty emails in my inbox. It was getting late, and I decided to deal with them in the morning. I put the kids to bed, showered and went to bed myself, after having turned off my computer and phone.
When I woke in the morning, I sent her an email that I wanted to talk, and that I would no longer be babysitting for her, and that I wanted no further communication with her. She was getting increasingly "scary" to me, and I don't need that in my life. So anyway, I turned on my phone, and there were several desperate voicemails and one nasty one. They all basically said the same thing. She was at the ER an hour away, she drove there with her kids because she was feeling sick and I wouldn't come get the kids because I wasn't answering my phone, but I had to come get the kids right now. That's the nice version. Anyway, I called the ER and let them know I would not be coming to pick up the kids because they wouldn't let me talk to her. She called me and texted me from her husband's cell phone at that point - now I have to assume that he was there the whole time, or had been called and arrived there just after her last call to me - negating the need for me to come get the kids.
So I answered the phone. I told her I would not be babysitting the kids at all any more. She started screaming obscenities at me, at which point i hung up. I texted her that her mental instability and her ability to snap at any given moment such as screaming obscenities at me was the reason our relationship was ending, both friendship and business. I felt the need to end it formally - no question about it.
She started texting me obscenities and ill wishes at that point. I had the number blocked, but she then started calling me from the hospital threatening me. I stopped answering the calls.
When she got out of the hospital that afternoon, she came to my house with her whole family. I wasn't home, we went to a friends house. My mom was home, and told her to go away. Her husband didn't want to make a scene, and they left.
After they went home, she got back in her car and drove back over. She started circling my block. My mom called the cops and notified them of it. She started texting my mom "where is she" and other questions to find out how to get to me, like "when will she be home". My mom ignored them.
When we got home, she pulled into the driveway less than 5 minutes later. I told her to leave, and then called the cops because she refused. She said she would camp out all night because she knew I had to leave the house sometime the next day for an appointment. I had to leave sometime, and she would be there when I did. She started screaming expletives at me through the window, and then she would calm down and try to explain her side of the story, which was always lies, such as "but we had a contract" and "i have stuff there" and "but I live there".
When the policeman arrived, she told him the same thing, that she wasn't leaving until I talked to her. He said he would check with me and see if I wanted to talk to her, and she said it shouldn't matter, that she had a right to talk to me, and her rights would prevail. The cop came in and told me that she was crazy (his words, not mine) and that he advises me not to have communication with her. I agreed, and he went outside to tell her she would have to leave or he would have to take her in. It took him 20 minutes to get her to leave.
Then she drove her car into the lake. Yes, you read right. I live 2 blocks from a man-made lake with a cute little shoreline that the kids love to go fishing in. It has park benches that she and I had sat on earlier in the summer and talked about my marriage falling apart. Shade trees and picnic tables surround the area. She drove her car through all of it, and down into the lake. She's fine. A passer-by saw it and dragged her out of the car before it sank. I wouldn't even have known except it came in over the officer's walkie-talkie while he was taking my statement. He said if she came here again after I made a statement, it would be considered trespassing and she would be arrested. So I made a statement and heard the call come over the radio.
I couldn't believe it. Her make and model car seen sinking into the lake. As we were planning on taking the kids out to dinner after this stressful day anyway, we ended up driving past the lake (the only way out of the development) and found out it was, in fact her and she was trying to refuse treatment. I thought she would be long gone by the time we left the house, it was more than a half hour or 45 minutes later. There was a crowd and a news crew and everything.
After we came back from dinner, the kids went to bed and I watched the news. Sure enough, she was seen driving her car into the lake, and resisted treatment. She was eventually brought to the hospital to be treated for non-life threatening injuries.
What is going to happen from here? I don't know. I can tell you this. I may never find out what happens to her. I have her phone, her husband's phone, her house phone and her email all blocked. I can't take this kind of toxicity anymore.
Prayerfully, my life can return to normal now, after this months-long endeavor of trying to get her to back off of me. I used to receive 10-15 different attempts at communication from her every day, starting at 3am and ending somewhere around midnight. So basically, around the clock. She would show up to my house uninvited and unexpected. She would call my mom or a friend she knew I was with if I didn't answer her within 5 minutes. It was getting to be too much even before this recent development and now it definitely is too much.
I now have no source of income, however I am confident that God will provide me with another, more suitable opportunity.
God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Starting A Daycare

2011-08-25T09:33:00.003-04:00

I have decided to expand. I have made this decision based on several things, which (of course) I will explain :) I wouldn't be me if I didn't explain!

One reason is that although we are "making it" financially, we are still struggling, and I would like to not be struggling anymore. I know that maybe sounds selfish, but we have been living this way for so long - tracking every single dollar. It would be nice to just be able to say "Kids, we're going to the zoo" and not worry that we won't have gas money to get back! LOL

Another reason that goes with the first is that I can handle it. I am learning that once you have more than 2 kids, there really isn't much difference in the organization of the day. I know this is a gross generalization, however I am going to try to stick with ages I already have, so that the kids can be grouped together. Preschool first with the olders helping, then school for the older kids while the preschoolers do directed activities, etc.

Reason #3 is that I need to start setting boundaries (or stronger ones) with the woman I currently do daycare with. I am drafting contracts, discipline policies, parent handbooks, etc. She isn't going to like it, but I am going to give them to her and she will have to sign. I know this will cause discord, but I have prayed on it, and I am trusting God that His will will be done through this. If she pulls her kids, I have to trust that He will provide either through other families or another way I have yet to think of.

I would eventually like to get registered with the state, and then also do tutoring and offer cyberschool through my home so that parents can choose homeschooling even if they work (I know there is a difference, but in this state, you can't truly homeschool someone else's kids without a teacher's certificate). I can do that now, but in order to have more than just 2 more kids, I would have to be registered.

Anyway, that's what's going on in my neck of the woods. Tomorrow (hopefully) I will post our new dayplan. My hope is to give other women home through what I am doing - how God is growing me. If you go back to some of my original posts (just click on the "alcoholism" or "about me" links and scroll all the way down or click oldest posts) you will see how much he has grown me in three years. I went from a girl (a 31 year old girl) who couldn't figure out how to keep her kids in check and was worried about doing everything for everyone else with little regard to herself to a woman who is running in-home care, taking care of her mother, leading ministries at church and cares about herself because Christ first cared about her. God truly is WONDERFUL and AWESOME and AMAZING.

I love what He is doing in me, and can't wait to see where He takes me next. I don't always enjoy the growing process, but I like the results when it is over. I am thankful to my friends (online and off) who help me get through these things - I couldn't do it without you!

God Bless,
One Christian Mom

Here we go again....

2011-08-19T07:37:00.004-04:00

You know - I am so tired of schedules. ;) I have a difficult time with them at best. But it seems our lives are run by them. Now, especially more than ever, I am bound to them. What starts this topic again today?

I was told yesterday by someone I care deeply about that I don't do enough. It was said in the context more of a joke, but it seems this person feels there is some truth to it. When I look around, I see the same. The problem is, I don't know where to get the time from!

Lately I am not a morning person. It is all I can do to drag myself up and out of bed at 7am, get breakfast for the kiddies, drink my coffee and perhaps eat something. Get dressed and supervise the kids morning chores. Then out the door - to go get the daycare kids. I agreed to do this because otherwise the mom drops them off whenever she gets around to it, and I have them for 8 hours after that - no matter what time she dropped them. She has come to get them as late as 8pm - although that is a topic for another post...I could go on and on. Yesterday I picked them up on time, and still she didn't come till half past 6.

Anyway, when we get back home, it's homeschool. With 3 kids being homeschooled and 2 littles running around, this lasts until around 3pm. Lunch and snacks thrown in there, with a brief wipe-down of the kitchen. After that, it's outside time, or inside PE - wii or something else like that. If it's outside time - or if we are going somewhere then I am out there with them. If it's inside time, I can supervise from the living room, dining room or kitchen. In that case, I can get the next day's school stuff together while they are doing that. Does it take two hours to get school ready? When there is cyber school and 2 different levels of traditional school to plan, along with keeping kids from fighting, yes it does.

Now it's supposed to be pick-up time. 5pm. Most times the girls are not picked up by then. However I still have to get dinner going. So I get dinner going amidst "I'm bored" and "I'm hungry" and whatnot. Once dinner's ready, if her girls are still here, I sit them down to eat, too. It's not fair to them or us for the dinner to get cold waiting for their mom or for them to go hungry.

So now it's after dinner - probably 6 or 6:30. Dinner clean up. Baths, bedtime routine. Now is also when I get my shower. After that is my "Free" time. By now it's around 9:30 or so pm. Sometimes I go to bed. I am wiped out! Sometimes I try to get stuff done. If we had outside time that day, I still have to get school together. If not, I try to get other stuff done, but again - I am wiped out. Sometimes I can get laundry folded. Bills paid or online research done. But nothing too much - I don't clean the bathroom or change sheets or vacuume after 9 at night.

I know I am no different from any other working mom. So when do you get things done? The laundry piles up. The bathroom goes with nothing more than a wipe-down. The carpets get vacuumed once a week. The sheets need to be changed.

None of that compares to the hoarders-style episode we have still going downstairs. When my soon-to-be-ex-husband moved out, going through his stuff (which he hasn't finished doing yet), he blocked off my pantry. So in order to get to it, I started piling stuff back up again. We had just barely started to go through that stuff and now it's all piled up again. I still can't really get to the pantry. I can stick one foot in and lean over and grab. Which caused a box of pasta to fall and burst open. Which is sitting there. Thankfully it was just pasta!

When do you all find time for this stuff??? I am so overwhelmed. My weekends are consumed with supervising visitation and outside activities. We need to see other people sometime! I do eventually need to relax or I am going to burst :) So ideas/suggestions welcome.

Thanks for letting me get that off my chest. :)

God bless,
One Christian Mom

PS - I promise - sometime soon I will start posting some helpful stuff again!

An Explanation

2011-08-16T14:17:00.003-04:00

Ok, so now to explain what has been going on in my household - but in short. I fear to share too much here, I have been struggling with gossip lately (again!) and need to be held accountable. Anyway, it seems God is doing a work in me - or trying to, at least. Sometimes I am like a child and need to be reminded, cajoled, re-taught and finally stared at in the face and explained. LOL

I struggle with co-dependency. Basically what that means in simple terms is that I am a people-pleaser and I am afraid to do something that could possibly cause someone upset. I do what people say because they said so! :P Not really, but you get the idea. I have been struggling with this all my life, but it is within the last few years that I have been wrestling with it - fighting the urge to just do what will please others without any thought to myself. I know we are commanded to love others as ourselves. Yes, that makes sense. However I cannot love others as myself if I don't even think of myself as someone that matters, as someone who's thoughts and feelings come into account. If I don't hold myself in regard, I cannot do the same to others!

Ugh - getting these kids to work on their own is going to be an effort for sure! Ok, back to the task at hand... I think. This one girl (I run a day-care homeschool) refuses to read the directions. Then when I read them to her, she can't follow them until I do the first answer for her. I don't understand why, and I am so frustrated because now my daughter is doing the same thing. "I don't know what this means" and "How do I do this one" gets asked about 17 or 18 times a day. I started using the 3 help cards idea, but those were gone before the first lesson was over, and then the girl crys when I won't help her. Ach! Anyway, back to what I was talking about...

So this week, a friend asked me - no wait, she didn't ask. A friend moved herself into my home on my birthday. We had gone out the night before, ...

ugh - she's crying again. Be right back. By the way, this one lesson - reading - has no actual reading in it. All the crying is over the directions for the workbooks - and the mom has her cyber-schooled, so it can't be avoided. I can't traditionally homeschool her, the state doesn't allow it, and so cyber is her only option if she wants to keep her out of the school system. So I do it, but really, she needs to learn how to follow directions. It seems the mom used to sit next to her and hold the workbook and pencil and ask her the questions and lead her to the answers, rather than figuring out if she had learned anything by letting her do it herself. I am going to have to find something in-between, but I am also going to have to teach her a lot myself. I was told she was at a 5th grade reading level in 2nd grade. What I am finding is that she reads at a 1st grade level. When the questions are posed to her in a certain way, she is comprehending at a 5th grade level. When the questions are given to her as written and she has to choose the answer, she cannot get any answers right. Anyway, she finally did it and it was correct so now back to my week. :)

Where was I... Ok, the night before she took me out to dinner. I had to pick her up because her husband had her car, and she doesn't drive his car. So I picked her up and we went to dinner. Then, she wanted to watch a movie, so I took her back to my house and we watched Forever Young - good movie! Anyway, durin the movie her husband became angered that she wasn't home yet. At one point she asked him to come pick her up and he said no. So then I said I would drive her home and she said no. It was late, and she crashed on the couch. I didn't think anything of it.

The next day (my birthday) I woke up, we ate breakfast, I dressed and I took her home. About a half hour later she shows up at my house with suitcases. One for her and one for the kids. And food. And a tub full of stuff. And backpacks. And Pillows, blankets and stuffties. It was obvious... she was moving it. I hugged her and let her move in without any thought to myself, my schedule, my needs/wants, or my children. She slept in my bed, without asking me if it was ok. She slept her daughters in my daughter's bed without asking if that would be ok (and it wasn't - all my daughter's medical equipment is in her room and cannot be easily moved.) So my daughter slept with my mom and I slept on the couch. Next thing I know, I am being replaced! I watch the kids, cook and clean, etc. She sleeps, works and crys. I didn't think at all about myself, my family's needs, etc.

Would I have let her move in if she had asked? Possibly - with an end date in mind. I know she and her husband have problems, and a brief respite turned out to be what they needed to start communicating again. But I cannot let someone escape their life, invade mine, and leave it that way indefinitely. I had to stand up for myself and my household. It was in shambles. No school getting done. Yelling all the time. Kids hearing things that are not meant for little ears. I just couldn't do it anymore. I gave her a choice on wednesday. She could stay until friday, or she could leave earlier. Not much of a choice, however it forced her to make some difficult decisions she had been putting off because she didn't have to make them.

I helped her learn that moving back home wasn't her only option. We discussed biblically what she should do next. We talked about what the problem was and if it could be resolved. Just so everyone knows - no one is getting hurt in that household. I wouldn't send her back to get hurt! But the issue seems to be communication. So I helped her write down talking points for when she feels like she is being shut out or ignored. she made some counseling appointments for herself and for marriage counseling. Then she moved home.

She didn't want to. She begged, pleaded, cajoled, tried to convince and finally cried to let her stay. But truth be told, she doesn't need to be here. By letting her stay, I would be enabling. I need to learn these things. Jesus talks about putting others first. But sometimes putting others first involves dealing with hard feelings of saying no because it is for the good of all.

I hope any of this makes sense. She is back home now. They have counseling coming up this week. She had her own appointment yesterday that seemed to go well. I know they still have problems. I have asked not to be brought into them. I really don't ever want to be in the middle of a husband and wife. That relationship is for 2 people - not 3! LOL

If my friend wants to ask my opinion on something I may answer, I may not. I will pray, and I will let her talk things out, but advice - counsel on marriage I have no place giving. I am not a licensed (or even trained) marriage counselor - my counseling knowledge is elsewhere. And my marriage is ending. Sadly, I think I enabled my way out of that one. That is a topic for another day.

So now school is over, and I am on my own, which means my day can continue in the usual routine. Time to get dinner started! :) Then, playtime while it cooks. Then the girls get picked up. We eat dinner. We read, take baths and go to bed. Then I get to relax a bit, put up my feet... HA! Nice dream. I get to get the school stuff together for another day. ;)

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Too Much is Just Too Much

2011-08-11T11:04:00.003-04:00

I have let this blog go for now. There is a lot going on at my house right now, and too many emotions surrounding it. If I were to type it all out right now, I would probably share too much and I don't want to do that. So please hang in there, keep me in prayer, and check back with me in a few days :)
Thanks and God Bless :)
One Christian Mom

Too. Many. Children.

2011-07-19T15:56:00.003-04:00

As you all know, I have 5 kids in my house on a daily basis now. My three, ages 8, 5 and 3 - at levels 2nd-3rd grade, 1st grade and pre-K. I also have a friend's kids ages 7 and 4, levels 2nd grade and pre-K. I have also started homeschooling for the year of 2011-2012. I start WAY early to give myself some leeway at Christmas time, and then again in march when I start to loose my mind :)

I have been successful so far at homeschooling the older two. They are at such a close level that if one is at a higher level than the other, I can modify the lesson so both can participate. Sometimes I am able to have my 5yo son sit in as well, on things like science, history, music and art.

My problem becomes doing the rest of the subjects with him, and also what to do with the two younger kids. The 4yo girl will sit and play or do activities nicely if she isn't interrupted. However my 3yo is very interruptive! He just loves to get on top of whatever she is doing. Even if I give him his own same thing as her, he still has to be on top of her.

I have used workboxes for my two older children, and they have worked well. I am putting the 7yo's stuff in my daughter's box since they are doing the same lessons. But for the two youngers, I tried filling workboxes with activities, and they just end up all over the table/floor/house. Then they get into toys in other areas.

I could spend my ENTIRE day trying to get my 3yo son to stay on task, but then that's not fair to the rest of the kids, either. I am overwhelmed. Today my mom was feeling well, and she was able to take the two younger kids and do an activity with them. But that is not always the case. My house is a wreck from all the toys all over the place, and I am too exhausted to clean it all up!

You see, my youngest is also not sleeping. My middle is sleeping sometimes, waking up once or twice, but my youngest is just fitful all night. This has been going on for as long as I have been watching the girls.

Any advice is welcome in the comments section. THANKS!
God Bless,
One Christian Mom

School Days 2 and 3

2011-07-13T11:33:00.002-04:00

Well, day one was a success. Day two, not so much. Adding in the second child was just more than the others could handle. ALL of them! LOL. We started our day innocently enough. The two older girls at the table, and the three younger ones playing legos. Then the other girl decided she wanted to do school, too. So I set her up with a wipe-book of letters and a dry-erase marker. Good enough. Then my 3 year old decided he needed one, too. So I set him up. Then the 5 year old starts crying because no one is playing with him. He doesn't want to do school yet. So I brought him to the table to play legos. Then the older girls wanted to do legos. AGH!

Eventually it all worked out. Each child rotated between playing and working. It makes for a long school day, but the only person it's long for is me, because they get continuous breaks. It will not work this way every day, but every once in a while it's ok. Really what I need to do is have workboxes for all the kids, and explain how they work and let them go through the activities.

Today is day three. My mom is feeling good enough to do crafts with the younger kids while the older ones do school. Then when the older ones are done, they will get to do crafts while the younger ones play. This is really good for me because it gives me a break, but mom can only handle this sometimes.

The only issue I am having is that the older day-care girl is not used to having anyone else doing school while she is doing it. So she reads out loud, she does her math out loud, she says her letters out loud while she is writing... and this trips up the other two who are trying to work. I keep having to remind her to work in her head quietly. Then she whispers. Sometimes I find my daughter trying to listen and copy. The funny thing is that the answers are not always right. So then I teach my daughter that cheating is wrong, and sometimes you get the wrong answers anyway!

So there are a few things to work on, but it will all work out in the end. :)

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

First Day of School

2011-07-11T11:35:00.003-04:00

Uh oh! I lost followers... how does that happen? Oh, well. I can't tell right away who I have lost, but since they will no longer be stopping by, I guess I can't find out why they left, right?

Today was our first official day of school. I know that learning never stops, but according to our state, we have to do 180 days of school between the months of July and June. In order to put a "buffer" between us and the school district, I start in July even though they won't start until the last week of August. That way, if we need time off for any reason, or want to get relaxed during the holiday season, we can. Our first official sit down day was today.

I only did school with my oldest today - she is the only one I need to "report" for the school district. My middle son, according to the district, would be in kindergarten this year, and thus does not need to be reported. And the youngest is preschool :) Anyway, We did 6 lessons today, and all went smoothly. I get my day-care kids back tomorrow after a long weekend, and I will school the two oldest tomorrow - my daughter and the older day-care girl. :) We should have fun - they are on the same level. Then I will do that for a few days, and then begin with my middle son.

I feel like if I do it this way, ease into it, I can get a better feel for what will work and what won't before the school district year begins and I have to contend with cyber school for the older day care child.

Have you ever had day care children in your home? Have you ever done cyber and traditional school at the same time? What worked for you?

Thanks for any advice, and also for your support! It means so much to me when I open my email and another one of my lovely online friends has left me a note of encouragement!
God bless,
One Christian Mom

The Tooth Fairy

2011-07-07T20:44:00.003-04:00

Well, we had an emergency visit from the tooth fairy last night. My daughter bumped her mouth yesterday and one of her lower teeth came loose. Throughout the day, she wiggled, twisted, and otherwise cajoled that tooth right out of her mouth. She's 8, and because of her size, she had never lost a tooth before. Most kids her age have half a mouthful of adult teeth. She was feeling quite left out.

So last night she wrote the tooth fairy a note. It read, "I know you usually (she had to ask me how to spell that one) take the tooth and leave a present, but can you leave the tooth? I want to keep it." It was the longest note she has ever written - she must have really wanted to keep that tooth! So last night the "tooth fairy" visited and left a dollar next to the tooth under her pillow.

The funny thing is, my 5 year old came up to me and asked me if there was really a tooth fairy. My standard response to this question about fantasy characters visiting our home (Santa, Easter Bunny, etc.) is "Well, you tell me." He said, "Nah, but it's fun to pretend!" Too cute!

Have a blessed day!
One Christian Mom

Best. Weekend. Ever.

2011-07-06T17:08:00.002-04:00

As you all know, especially if you read my last post, I have a bit of a different situation in my home now. This situation allows me to get out of the house more often, especially with the kids. They are SO not used to going places. Especially on the weekends. We even stopped getting invited places about 3 years ago because people knew I couldn't come anyway, and I was told it was just making people feel bad that I couldn't go... well, that's another story for another time.

This past weekend, being 4th of July weekend, we were invited by "general invite" to a friend's bbq, but also my daughter had her 8th birthday party, we were invited to the movies and ice cream, and we went to the "beach" by our house (a lake where they imported sand :) ).

First was my daughter's birthday party. Most who were invited attended, and a good time was had by all. It was a nice day outside, and the party guests meandered between inside and out. There were crafts, party games, lunch, a cake, presents - a hula theme - it was just a good time. I wasn't worried about whether or not he would show up (even living here, sometimes he wouldn't), whether or not he would be drunk (so what? I wouldn't have to put up with it if he was) or if his family would snub me this year (I knew they would!). So much pressure off of me... maybe that sounds contrite, but it was the truth. I could just enjoy the party guests and the fact that my daughter was having a fabulous time.

Next up - after the party, friends of mine invited us to a movie and ice cream. There is a wonderful place not too far from here where they have a diner attached to a movie theater. We took the kids to see Cars 2. It was a cute movie, and the kids enjoyed it. Even my 3 year old sat through the movie. There was even some humor for adults in there (that wasn't "adult humor", just things adults would find funny.) After the movie, we sat in the diner and had ice cream. It's a dollar a scoop, so we all were able to have a different flavor and share. :)

The next day after church was a bbq at a house on a lake at a friend's house :) So much fun. Kids for the kids to play with and go in the water with. Friends to interact with. Good food. Just an all around good time!

The following day I decided to take the kids to the beach in my development. We have lived at this house for almost years, and I have never been to the beach here. What was I missing? The kids had so much fun. We stayed there for over 4 hours. Fun in the sand and water. We will definitely be going back.

All in all, I think we did too much. We all have slight sunburns. We are all exhausted, me more so than everyone else. I need to learn to pace ourselves. But now we have been invited to several more events - I am so excited. I also want to host at least one more bbq this summer. Wow - summer life :)

How was everyone's 4th?
God Bless,
One Christian Mom

A New Chapter

2011-06-29T11:13:00.002-04:00

Wow, it's been a long time since I posted anything. I thank you all for your continuing comments. I feel blessed that my followers and friends keep up with me even when I seemingly drop off the face of the blogsphere! :) I have good reason for disappearing, which I will now explain to you.

My husband of 10 years and I are getting a divorce. Things finally came to the point where I realized, then was convicted that this marriage is never going to work. I know - some of you (I used to believe this, too) believe that there is never good reason for divorce. If you had asked me last year, 5 years ago, 15 years ago if I would ever get a divorce, I would have said no. People would say things like, "even if he hurt you?" or "even if he cheated?" and my answer would still be, "No." My reasoning was that God can heal all, fix all, etc.

I am realizing, however, that it takes 2 people to be married. If only one person is married, and the other person just has a piece of paper (marriage certificate), it doesn't work. Yes, I can do what he says. Yes, I can stay faithful. Yes, I can raise the kids and keep the house and do all those things. But we haven't been partners in life for years. About 4 years for "marriage" and more than that for partners in life.

Without sharing too much on the Internet, things came to a head for me. His mother passed on to the Lord about 2 months ago. She was as much a mother to me these past 15 years as she was to him, and I had a lot of emotion with her passing, as he did. Obviously it's his mom, you know? But I was not devoid of emotion. I tried to hug him to console him, as it happened on a rare occasion that he was here. He had already been spending more than most of his time away from here. Living with his parents and coming every few weeks to see the kids for a day or so. So he was here, and I tried to hug him when he got the news. He actually backed away from me as if I was a carrier of some disease. That was the final confirmation for me.

I went to pastoral counseling (my pastor is a licensed clinical and family therapist as well). My pastor is awesome. He informed me of all my choices. He gave me biblical references that supported all of them. He let me know that the church would support me no matter my decision. No condemnation. No "divorce is for non-Christians" lecture.

Before you all go off on me - please know that there is more to this story than meets the eye. It's just not information to post publicly on the 'net. If you are interested, for those of you who have my email, please message me and we can continue privately. But it wasn't a simple separation - a parting of ways. I have been through A LOT these past 4 years or so. That is one reason my pastor was so accepting of my decision. He is not an advocate for divorce, but sometimes... well, some decisions are harder than others, you know?

So anyway, after the funeral, and a few weeks later, I informed my husband of my decision. There was NO WAY I was going to tell him before all the difficulties that a funeral brings. One thing at a time, you know? Once it was all over, and life had resumed, I sat him down and informed him. He said he was shocked but agreed all to easily. He agreed to child support, to living arrangements, to separation of property. The only thing he didn't agree to was custody. He wants me to have primary custody (no problems there) with him being able to come see them when he wants to. That sounds all fine and good, except for the implications... He doesn't want to see them far often enough, and when he does, it's just for a few hours. Then there is the issue of the fact that he expects me to be here and still take care of everything while he visits. Basically, he wants to be considered company while he comes and visits the kids for a few hours every few weeks. Ugh.

So that's my story for why I have been absent online. There are so many emotions involved with this. It would be SO very easy to come online and post way too much (maybe I already did), put my emotions up all over the place, and basically be inappropriate. I need all of you to keep me accountable as to whether I am posting too much. I think I kept it fairly factual rather than emotional. I am trying so very hard not to place blame - I know it takes 2, and that I played a part. I am still trying to see what that part is.

As most of you know, I am now the leader of a group at my church called Celebrate Recovery. I became the leader sometime near the beginning of February of this year. This group, over the past 2 years, has helped me deal with so much of my past, bringing me to a point of being able to take care of myself, and my family without wondering if I am "doing it right" or "doing enough" or whatever. I am co-dependent by nature. Anyway, this group has helped support me through everything, they have become a second family to me over the years. Now that I am leader, I thought I would be supporting everyone else, and that I wouldn't have any support. But that is so not true. They have continued to support me through this, and don't think any less of me for having a difficult time. Leaders aren't above anyone else, we are one of the crowd who has been chosen to direct :) So those of you who are reading this: THANK YOU!!!

God Bless,
One Christian Mom

Does Exhaustion = Laziness?

2011-04-07T20:11:00.002-04:00

I am exhausted. I have been for some time now. My only explination for this is that I have become lazy. I take the easy way out far to often, and that has made me complacent and lazy. I use my bread machine to mix dough rather than do it by hand. I use my mixer to whip cream rather than do it by hand, etc... I use the snowblower to clear snow rather than shovel. So when I do something that requires any exertion at all, I get exhausted. Am I getting old? I am in my early 30's. I don't consider that old, but when I mentioned my recent exhaustion to my father, he noted that I am no "spring chicken". Hmph! Ok, so I can't run around the block anymore, but I do know a lot of people far older than I who can. So is it my age? I don't think so. I never was much for exercise as we think of it today. I was never much for going to the gym, or for having workout videos and the like. I was more of a "do it manually and you won't need exercise" kind of person. Well, I have eliminated all of my laborous things with machines! It happened slowly over a matter of years, however it's to the point now where my wrists hurt when I knead dough by hand. Ack! So now I am thinking about exercise. I shouldn't be winded clearing off my car (yes, it's still snowing here!) I shouldn't have to ask for help when my furniture arrives and I can't carry it up the stairs. What say you? Do you have any fitness routines you swear by? Should I just go back to a manual way of life? I feel blessed to have all my machines, most of them do more than double duty around here, giving me more time to focus on kids, ministry, other household chores, my own well being, etc. However I am tired. And I am tired of being tired. Anyway, thanks for any advice!!! God Bless, One Christian Mom

Medication

2011-03-25T23:28:00.003-04:00

Ughness. One word to describe the way I have felt this week. I can't remember anything, I feel like a total flake. I am sore everywhere, for no apparent reason. I shake. I have a headache. My eyes hurt. Etc, etc, etc. All from one little tiny pill. Have I ever mentioned I hate medication?

I tried to wean myself off of hypothyroid pills and use more natural methods to keep it under check. Guess what? I'm no doctor (or even a homeopath!) LOL We already knew that, but now it's apparently obvious. Anyway, here's the story...

A few weeks ago, I ran out of thyroid pills, and the doctor refused to prescribe more. A little issue of not having been to the doctor in 3 years or something. :) Yeah, I'm THAT kinda person. It doesn't help that I haven't had medical insurance in over 3 years. Yes, I have gone to the doctor in that time. Exactly twice. Once for the flu, and once for an infection in my finger.

Since the last physical I had, after having my 2nd child, the doctor has been re-prescribing my medication for me every year. (By the way, my 2nd child is 5 years old). So, it's been a while! I have no medical insurance, and so I was prayerful and thankful when they just prescribed it and let it be.

This year I didn't fall through the cracks. They refused to prescribe it. So I went off it! Not a good idea. Apparently the thyroid functions more than just metabolism and hunger cues. No-siree, that's not all. As you can see, my writing is a bit more sarcastic than usual. I am letting it come through for a reason - to see that it affects everything from demeanor to attitude, etc. I can cry at the drop of a dime, yell at the smallest inconvenience.

I said I can - thankfully and only by the grace of God has it been kept under control. It takes every.effort.I.have to keep it under wraps. Sometimes a little slips through, and the sarcasm is a bit much, but it helps regulate the anger. Where is the anger even coming from???

Anyway, longer story shorter, I called the doctor and explained my financial situation. He prescribed 2 months - enough time for me to save up for one visit and one blood test. After that, if I am not regulated, I will have to do more blood tests, but we will pray against that. I finally got my meds back 2 days ago, and pray they take effect soon :)

Another side effect - I have gained more than 7 lbs in 2 weeks just being off the meds. That was anticipated, and I was trying to stave it off, but I am like insanely hungry all the time. Oh well - it will all be over soon. They say in 2 weeks I will be regulated, so only 11 more days - but who's counting.

Please let this be a lesson - let the medical professionals do their job, and don't go off a med without a plan!
God Bless,
One Christian Mom

All-Natural

2011-03-19T21:04:00.003-04:00

As you all know, I have been moving toward a more natural lifestyle. Where chemicals are involved, I am trying to eliminate as many as possible. In our foods this is proving to be more difficult than I could have imagined. Chemicals are in everything, from butter and meat to all prepackaged foods, and even fresh produce. Obviously I know that they use pesticides in most commercially grown foods, but I didn't realize the impact that has on health. Maybe I thought, "It must be ok since it's allowed, right?" Wrong. Anyway, that's a post for another blog - I have read them and understand them, but can't really explain it well :) If you are interested, please leave a comment and I can lead you to some good websites to start your own research.

As far as household tasks, the switch has been far easier than I ever could have imagined. Basic ingredients can make a multitude of cleaning projects easier, not to mention healthier. If you have a clogged drain, first plunge it, if you can. Then, pour some baking soda down the drain, followed by vinegar. Careful you don't end up with a volcano, though! I have done this and it cuts through whatever is clogging the drain beautifully. Also, if you have stained pots, put a baking soda/water paste at the bottom and let it sit. Wipe it with a damp cloth after about 10 minutes and it wipes the stains of burnt food and mineral dense water right off. Baking soda is great in the bathroom, too - it deodorized the toilet and can scrub grout.

Vinegar is a good all-purpose cleaner. I use it with a half/half mix of vinegar/water to clean tables, countertops, appliances, etc. I have eliminated virtually all cleaning chemicals in my home. Windows and mirrors do well with just plain rubbing alcohol.

Laundry detergent is a mix of washing soda, borax and soap. Borax is not as safe as the other things I work with, however it is needed to get the clothes clean, so I use it. At least it's not blue dye #40 and polyproplene or whatever else is in that stuff.

Shampoo I have had a hard time giving up. Truthfully, I still use it. I know I could use baking soda with a vinegar rinse, however I just have a hard time with it. However, I was easily able to give up body wash. Soap is about as basic as it comes, and I make my own - but I also buy Ivory. Apparently it's the same as I make at home - so please correct me if I am wrong. Lye, fats and water. Now that I think about it, they probably add fragrance. I will have to look into that.

Ah, the dreaded make-up. Well, I wear mineral makeup, I don't know if that is any better than the regular stuff. I definitely don't wear it every day. Just when I am presenting at church. Otherwise, I feel "painted". But in those bright lights up at the podium, without it, I look washed out and sickly :)

I get excited when I find a new use for an old product. I know most people probably know this, but it was new to me. I just found out I can use my coconut oil as a moisturizer. I love it! My hands are cracked and sometimes split. I hated using chemical-laden lotions on my hands because I knew they were not only seeping in through the poors, but also in through the cracks. Now I don't feel bad because it's the coconut oil. My hands are on the mend :)

That's all for now. Do you have any more natural tips for us?
God Bless,
One Christian Mom

Progress

2011-03-18T23:23:00.004-04:00

Well, today was good in terms of how much time I spent online. I went online once at lunch to check my email (and I was glad I did - more on that later), and now since I got home from my church meeting, so maybe an hour. When I am done with this post I will turn of the computer, not to be turned on again at least until tomorrow afternoon. I haven't decided if my rules for the weekend will be the same, but I imagine they should be. Usually I fall asleep with the computer on, on my bedside table - but I am going to try to break that addiction as well.

So that email check this afternoon. This is gonna sound strange, but I felt led to turn on my computer. I wrestled with this, especially with my newfound reasoning not to do so. However, I felt this nagging urge to turn it on, and not because I wanted to do anything on it, just that I should turn it on. So I did. I have been learning not to ignore the Holy Spirit - and it seemed to be just that. Anyway, I turned it on, and pulled up the net. I get instant notification on my toolbar of emails and facebook stuff, and both had notifications. So I pulled up facebook first - better chance of finding out what has me so worked up - with email I have to wade through lots of stuff before I can see any kind of personal emails! So I go to facebook and it seems I was needed.
All the while, please know my kids were eating lunch and not being ignored :) It's a laptop, and it, up until yesterday, had a semi-permanent place of residence on the kitchen island facing the table. :P It was ousted from that residence for most of today, anyway.
I did have a message in my email as well, and I was able to help, even in some small way. Had I gotten there sooner, I might have been able to do more, however God always finds a way, and all is well.
It does, however, make me second guess my need to be completely off-line in order to not use the computer. There is a line there that seems to be finer than I originally expected it to be.
I am going to continue to try to stay mostly off-line, but next time I get that kind of nagging urge, I will get online a bit sooner than I did this time!

Anyway, whatever happened to phones? Phones were so much easier. It rings, you answer. It doesn't ring, you leave it alone unless you have something you need to tell someone. Maybe I am a dinosaur, but I miss telephones - you know, real ones! Texting drives me batty :)

God Bless,
One Christian Mom

Too.Much.Time

2011-03-17T22:32:00.004-04:00

Have you ever wondered where all your time goes? Lately, with all the chaos, I have not been wondering. Until this last week. Yes, I still have commitments, however the unplanned chaos is over and done with. And yet I am not able to keep up. A few things have come to light to me, ironically through the computer (you will understand in a second). A friend of mind wrote a blog post on housework, and how we need to "just do it". :) Another friend typed up a question on The Homeschool Lounge about how much time we each spend online. I also do surveys, and a recent one was on "lets find out if you are Internet addicted"!

Here's a little confession. I would MUCH rather be on the computer than cleaning house. I know, not much of a confession, right? Not many of us actually enjoy housecleaning. It's not the actual cleaning I despise, though. It's the complete lack of social interaction while cleaning. And it's not just the house that is suffering. The car isn't looking too pretty. My projects go unfinished. My running around waits until the last minute. My class preparation does the same. It all gets done eventually, but not when it should, or with the attention that it deserves.

And why? Because there isn't anyone to interact with! I think I am social network addicted 0_o . Ok, all joking aside, I maybe am not addicted, or maybe I am (yes, my kitchen is clean, my kids are fed, we are all clean, clothed, etc.)- but the fact of the matter is I spend way too much time online that can better be spent elsewhere. I did pretty good today, but yet at 10:30 at night I am making up for it, when I should be in bed trying to fall asleep!

I actually got an MP3 player for my birthday last year, and I thought it would solve the problem. I could put the thing in one ear, and listen to books on tape, or blogradio podcasts, or whatever while I go about my day. Problem is when I am doing that, I can't concentrate on anything else. No - I need to go "cold turkey!" ;)

I think I have written this post before! Maybe about once a year or so I evaluate my time spent doing various things. Maybe in the spring when the first warm weather hits? Here's the thing... I am going to seriously try to limit my screen time this coming week. I will still post - especially updates on how I am doing. I will read your blogs if I have enough time on my timer. I plan to turn the computer on, get the Internet running, then set a timer. Maybe 1.5 hours? After dinner but before bed. That's usually Grandma's special time with the kids anyway. Sometimes I have church meetings at that time, so possibly those days I will fit it in after church, or maybe not go on at all? Then I will start with my email inbox, that gets crazy if I don't check it. Then Facebook - lots of people trying to get ahold of me there. After that, if there's time I will go to the blogs - and finally (laughing at myself here thinking I will have any time left!) the forums.

Honestly, right now, the forums is where I spend most of my time. If they had chatrooms, that's where I would be - but I have yet to find a "safe" chatroom. So I stick to the forums. Forums for Homeschoolers, forums for the Budget Wise, forums for people who consider themselves Preppers, forums for people who are Couponers... Then the blogs - blogs about healthy eating, blogs about holistic nutrition, blogs about homeschooling moms, blogs about people's days, blogs about crafters, etc.

I do learn a lot on the Internet, however it's got to end sometime. I plan on keeping a list of what I want to look up on the Internet when I turn the computer on, so that I am not compelled to just "go look it up right now" all day long.

I am going to try to do the same for my kids. One hour of screen time. Can I do it? Time will tell.

God Bless,
One Christian Mom

Rest

2011-03-15T21:23:00.002-04:00

Sometimes I feel guilty when I rest. There is so much to do in a day, that it seems that any time spent resting is wasted or frivolous. However, I have recently come to the conclusion that if I don't rest, less gets done!

So as I sit here on the computer and resting before bed:
the dishes could be getting unloaded from the dishwasher
the school stuff could be becoming organized
the last load of laundry could be getting folded
the floor could be getting swept.

Ok, all but that last one are going to wait until morning. I can't go to bed with a dirty floor :) Everyone has their "thing."

If I tried to do all of that tonight, it would probably take me an hour, maybe a bit more. It would be 10:30 at night, and I would be worked up from working! I wouldn't fall right asleep, and I wouldn't get a restful night's sleep (this knowing comes from experience :) ). Tomorrow, I would be grumpy, not feel well, and probably get none of tomorrow's stuff done - and possibly skim through school for not feeling "up to it".

By leaving the leftovers, spending some time in rest, and some in restful prayer, I will go to bed, go to sleep, sleep well (provided one or more of the kids doesn't wake me during the night), and wake up refreshed. Tomorrow I will start the morning emptying the dishwasher while the eggs are cooking. I will put together the school stuff while the kids are dressing/brushing. I will fold the laundry while giving a spelling test. By the time school is done, so is the stuff left from tonight - and on to the stuff for tomorrow! :)

How do you feel about rest?
God Bless,
One Christian Mom

What To Write - and a review of dehydrators

2011-03-13T19:38:00.004-04:00

So, what do you all post on when you don't know what to post? Do you just not post for a while? Do you wait for something to come to you? I see most people who's blogs I read post at least weekly, and the ones with a bigger following post about 1x a day. Some of the coupon blogs I read actually post several times a day!

However sometimes, I just can't think of something blog-worthy. Do you really want to be reading what I ate for dinner, or how the latest doctor's appointment went? Yes, I write for me first, however this isn't my daily journal either. I guess it's a balance.

Oh, I know what I can write about! LOL Does it ever just come to you like that? Ok, well recently I purchased a dehydrator. One of the ways you can really save money is by stocking up on something when it is on sale. We do that for frozen veggies, but we don't really enjoy canned, and although I do buy them for emergency-type situations, they aren't the first thing I want to eat. Anyway, we also don't like canned or frozen veggies. Just don't like the texture. So... I started dehydrating them.

First, I bought at Oster dehydrater. Let me tell you, save your money. It is LOUD, and it doesn't fully dehydrate anything. Right on the box it says dehydrator, however even when left for 2 days, paper thin apples didn't fully dehydrate. I returned the item as defective per the service agreement (it didn't work as advertized) and purchased the Ronco dehydrator in it's place. OH, wow. This thing is wonderful. Now, if you have some money to spare, what I really would have liked was an excalibur, however they are pricy. On the flip side, the Ronco works as advertised and it is not too expensive at all. It will pay for itself many times over. I was able to get all the loss leader produce for the last 2 weeks, and I have been dehydrating it. Potatoes, carrots, broccoli, mushrooms, apples, strawberries, bananas, etc. As for the veggies, I reconstitute and serve, or add to the crockpot with soup/stew, etc and let them reconstitute on their won. As for the fruits, we eat them as chips :) Yum! Also, I stir them into oatmeal, you can use them for cobblers or pies, etc. As I said, I have only had it about 2 weeks, but it's already getting it's use.

The other appliance I am in the market for is a crock-pot. Mine died yesterday. I was so sad, my husband asked me if I wanted to bury it in the yard! :) I need a new one, and apparently my requirements are not in line with the industry's. I want a locking lid, I want it to automatically switch to warm after a specified amount of time, and that's it! You can get one or the other, not both. Oh, except for one model that in the reviews I found out has a problem with turning off on it's own whenever it feels like it!

So I am still on the hunt for a crock pot. What is a girl to do without her crock pot?

God Bless,
One Christian Mom

Behavior Modification

2011-03-09T19:24:00.004-05:00

Once again, I am doing behavior modification with my kids. It seems that about every 6 months or so, I get lax (which is the only explanation) and things get totally out of hand. Other times I cannot say my children are perfect, however they are much more compliant and less disrespectful. I dislike that word strongly - disrespectful. It conjures up all sorts of unpleasant memories for me. However it is the truth of the matter. So, time to get things back in hand.

As you may have read here before, I love the book "Raising Godly Tomatoes." I am re-reading it again - notes in the margins and all! :) This time I am making myself a "cheat sheet" of things I want to remember throughout, things not to let go of so that things don't get out of hand again.

It all starts with "Tomato Staking," which is basically keeping your children within eyesight at all times. For the littlest children, it's keeping them at your side. I am doing it a little different this time, mainly because my oldest is 7 and in better shape behaviorally then ever before. I attribute this in no small part to nutrition, but that is a post for another day! She is still getting some alone time, which she is using to either read or play her princess dollhouse, or some other quiet activity. She does get an attitude from time to time, and when she does, the outcome is the same for her as for the others. We don't call it a time-out, but it's the same principal. Stand in the corner quietly with no movement for 7 minutes. For my 5 year old it's 5 minutes. For my 3 year old, he can sit, but no sound for 3 minutes. During this time, they are asked to think about why they are in the corner, and what they could have done differently as to not end up there. When they come out they are required to 1) apologize - if they aren't ready to do so, back in they go. 2) explain why they were in there. And 3) tell how they could have handled things differently as to not have ended up in the corner.

For my daughter, age 7, she is usually in there for attitude towards myself, my husband or my mom. She seems to think (these days) that she can speak to an adult as if she was a rowdy teenager (which I pray my kids never become! I have read about the differences between young adults and teenagers, and I pray and am working toward the former). Of course, this is not allowed. Whenever she is upset about something she has to do that she does not want to do, she gets an attitude. We are in day 2, and already it is easing up. She has yet to have a tantrum, she is trying to help and wants all her privileges back so is working towards them.

For my son, age 5 - well, he seems to have middle child syndrome! Most of his "corner times" come from sibling rivalry. "He stole my thing" or "she's blocking my way" or even "but I wanted it" are common themes from him. Whenever 2 of the kids are fighting, I can usually assume he instigated the matter. Sure, sometimes his little brother "started it," but he sure doesn't help! I have started putting any 2 arguing children in time out together. This works! First they have to stand side by side, quiet and not fighting. Then they have to last as long as the youngest child's time. Afterwards, we all sit down and talk about how things could have gone differently. I think he hates this most of all, because it is where he has to concede that he played a major role in the problem.

My 3 year old - well, he's three! :) We deal with mess making, mess making and more mess making. That, and taking things that don't belong to him. He's the hardest to get through to. However, I do have to remember that at this age, my daughter was much worse to deal with than he is. He's three.... I just keep telling myself that. We had almost a 30 minute session trying to get him to sit in the corner (SuperNanny style) this afternoon, and afterwards he just went right back to doing what he wasn't allowed to do! So back in he went. I am PRAYING that this takes with him. He sets the other two off - when he's good we have harmony. When he's not, well... it's not harmonious, we'll just leave it at that.

So day 2 and things are going ok. I would have liked to spend more one on one time with each of them today, however it was baking day, so all at once it was :) At least, as a stay at home and homeschooling mom, I have all the time in the day (and if you believe that, there's a tropical island I want to sell you!) HAHAHA OK, but at least I have them home with me all day and can address these things alongside cooking, cleaning, laundry and school.

Pre-tel, how do you keep your kids from going off the deep end?
God bless,
One Christian Mom

We Have Hot Water!

2011-03-06T20:07:00.004-05:00

I never thought I would be so happy to do a load of dishes in my entire life! :) Thank the Lord that I have a husband who is handy and knowledgable in these things. He helped me research new ones (computers are not his forte, however water heaters are not mine.) He took out the old one, thought of a new use for it, purchased the new one, and installed it. Same day service :) Another notable thought - he wasn't even supposed to be home this weekend, it was his weekend on-call, and he gave it to someone else so he could be home doing this. Amazing. For all the "stuff" we have been through, he's still there for us.

Church today was good. I was in the nursery. I love those little babies. :) Too adorable, all dressed in their Sunday best. We had 5, which is more than we have had in a long time. A lot of people keep their babies in the service, but today, one caused a chain reaction fussiness! LOL So we (the nursery workers) benefited from that.

Also, I have a wonderful friend who is getting me the newspaper on Sundays now! I had not been getting the coupons for a few months now, since the lady who used to get them for me no longer recieves them herself. So my friend heard about it, and said she would pick up papers for me on her morning run! Yeah! :) Also, she had a raincheck for pasta that she didn't end up needing, so she gave it to me. We are stocked up on pasta for a while now.

That's just about it for today. I am in much better spirits now, although the last week seems like a month, and most of it is a blur. But onward and upward, right?

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Daybooking

2011-03-04T23:26:00.003-05:00

OK, I am going to try my hand at Daybooking. I had thought of doing it once before but got sidetracked... LOL, but I just went over to a friend's blog and she was doing it which reminded me I wanted to as well. So here goes!

Outside My Window ~ Darkness and cold. It's after 11pm and it's February in the mountains. That would make it somewhere around 20 degrees if we are lucky. Oh well - spring will be here in a few months!

I am Thinking ~ That I need to plan homeschool for tomorrow. We are on a revised schedule because of my husband's work schedule, so we have to get to it tomorrow! Running a little late tonight :)

I am Thankful For ~ So many things. The first one that comes to mind is the fact that I CAN homeschool. Then comes the blessing of the church which was revealed to me again tonight.

I am Creating ~ A blanket for my middle son. I am working backwards. Somehow my youngest got his first. Now I am working on my middle son's. Then my daughter still wants one (at age 7). I love that they know the meaning of something handmade.

I am Reading ~ Homeschool Educator's Magazine. We made a trip to the library a few days ago, and I always pick one up if they have any new ones. Yeay!

I am Praying ~ For my extended family. My cousin's funeral was today, and I know they must be hurting.

I am Hearing ~ The dryer! Of all things, right?

From the Kitchen ~ Drip, drip, drip. We have a leaky faucet. Nothing we can do about it - well water, you know? We get a new one, it leaks in 3 months. It's actually quite soothing after a time.

Around the House ~ All are sleeping (except for me, of course). I need to get to bed!

We are Learning ~ About leading ministry. It's not just the person who becomes involved, but the entire family!

A Few of My Favorite Things ~ Kids, family, friends. Ok not things, but my favorites :)

Plans for the Weekend ~ My son is actually on his first-ever planned sleepover. He was so excited! His best friend (I didn't know kids had best friends at his age, but apparently they do!) invited him, and his mom said she told him he could invite my son. So off he goes! His friend's mom just happens to be a close friend of mine, so I was comfortable. Anyway, tomorrow I will anxiously await his arrival, and after that, a friend has invited us over for the afternoon. Sunday, water heater replacement after church. Fun!

On my Mind ~ All that wasn't enough?! LOL This is why I say I am going to try my hand at daybooking. I don't do well with categorizing thoughts into outline style.

Anyway, that's my day! God Bless.
One Christian Mom

A Myriad of Thoughts

2011-03-03T20:56:00.003-05:00

My days have been consumed with emotional thoughts. Today was better than yesterday, for sure. However I am still unable to keep a coherent thought for long. I did manage, however to cook three meals, clean up a bit, do some laundry, complete homeschooling for the day, and - well, I think that's it. :)

My friend came home from the hospital today. I am not entirely sure she was ready, but bureaucracy (read the healthcare system) says she needed to go home, so home she is. She is happy to be home, however a bit apprehensive as well.

My cousin's wake was today and the funeral tomorrow. I will be unable to attend, as my mom has become ill again. She would also liked to have been able to attend, however that just wasn't a possibility.

My mom "isn't feeling right" (her words) again, and so we had a visiting therapist come and visit today. Her BP was rather high, and I am supposed to be watching for other symptoms and be in the wait for another ER visit.

It seems as if the ministry I have become so attached to will continue, at least for the short term. My pastor has given it the go-ahead on a trial basis with me as the leader, in wait for a male co-leader. For this particular ministry, it is important to have both a male and a female leader. We have several people in mind, but they have to be asked, and be in prayer about it before any one can be named leader. Also, I have to take a leadership course at the church, this being my first time as head of a ministry.

So that's mostly what has been going through my head today. Tomorrow is another (and hopefully less emotional) day. As I think back across the years this blog has been open, I am actually not the same person I was then. Back then, had all this happened at once, I would have been in a vegetative state at best. Ranting and raving may have been happening. Unhealthy thoughts would have been a given. Yelling, throwing, etc - yeah, I am in a better place :)

God Bless and good night!
One Christian Mom

Please keep us in prayer

2011-03-01T14:56:00.002-05:00

I have had a very difficult week or so. A friend of mine is in bad shape, and she ended up in the hospital yesterday morning. I stayed with her as long as I could, until her parents arrived. They stayed with her a while, and now friends are "rotating" during visiting hours, I go again tonight. she could really use your prayers, as could I - I have been very emotional about this.

Also, I found out this morning that a cousin of mine died in a fatal car accident last night. He was fairly young - only 47 years old. This hit hard, I mean he was my cousin! His family could use prayer - his adult daughter was in the car with him when it happened, and she is understandably shook up (I am not sure that even begins to convey what she is feeling, but words have escaped me.

Finally, a church program that I have held near and dear to my heart for over 2 years, and that helped me become the woman of Christ I am today may come to an end. This is difficult for me, because not only does this program continue to help me, it has helped me grow into helping others. I see people every day growing in Christ because of this program, healing from past hurts and accepting God's gift. Because of reasons beyond my control, it may end.

I know God uses all for His glory, I just wish I understood it sometimes.
So anyway, please if you would, be in prayer for my friend, for my family, for my church program and also, if it's not too selfish, for me. Thank you!
God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Time

2011-02-25T13:44:00.002-05:00

Is there ever enough time in the day? Enough days in the week? Enough weeks in the year? I am not so sure. I am feeling so stretched for time these days. I have learned a lot about myself, however. Here are some things I have been able to figure out...

1. I need to keep my outside obligations to late afternoons and evenings. Mornings just stress me out. Sunday morning is a given, but anything else in the morning is too much when I have school.

2. If I actually set up the workboxes in the evening, the next day goes much smoother. The organization seems to carry over to all other areas.

3. I should only be a "leader" in 2 ministries at a time. More than that, and I start to feel overly stressed.

4. Summers are the time for clearing out, not winter! LOL This seems obvious, but ever since my mom got here, I feel hard-pressed to clear out that downstairs. She has her room, but still, you know? So I want to do it, but since we've started, it's snowed WAY too many times, and I have had to stop. SO no more 'till it all thaws out.

5. I need to get better at communication. This seems to be a big time waster. I don't state what I need, and I end up doing what every one else needs rather than what I need with whatever time I have left.

Just to clarify on number 5 - I do a lot of things for people - and I don't mind one bit. However, when I fail to communicate when or how much time I can devote to these things, it tends to cause a fallout in my time management. However, this does not apply to when I am taking care of an immediate need, such as when my mom was recently in the hospital, or when my friend had a seizure and needed help around her house and with her kids. Those things I will devote my time to, and bring school with me, and just do a "group session" :) . So that's my clarification. I do think that I would be able to keep my house in order much better even given these emergencies if I was better at time management!

So my goal for the next 30 days (otherwise, in the Month of March) I plan to keep on top of putting the workboxes together every night, keeping my priorities to afternoons or later (with the current obligation of MOPS which I need to see through to June), and to keep honest communication lines open.

Does anyone else evaluate their goals this time of year? See what's working and what's not? I seem to do it this time every year.

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

It Really Works!!!

2011-02-14T17:30:00.003-05:00

I cannot believe the difference. Truthfully, I was beginning to wonder if all this work was worth it. Well, this weekend, I learned it is! On Saturday, I had to do school because we had taken off on Monday. Also, I had to do the grocery shopping. Well, those two things together take up most of the day. School until 2:30, then shopping and I got home around 5pm. Yes, we live pretty far from the store, and when I go, I go to more than one store, so it takes a while. I also had other errands to run - you know the drill.

Anyway, I picked up a frozen pizza and garlic bread from the store so I didn't have to cook when I got home and was unpacking groceries. I turned on the oven, put in the pizza, and while it was cooking I unpacked. Convenient, right? Well, from now on, I will keep a HOMEMADE pizza in the freezer for just such an occasion! On to Sunday...

Sunday morning I had an egg sandwich, like I do so many Sunday mornings. However, I didn't have a fruit with it, and no milk or Kefir. Just the egg sandwich and some tea. After church, a friend offered to take me out to lunch for Valentine's Day! :) Yum. Good food, and good company, who could want more? Then, I realized... I don't enjoy straight water, and I wanted to enjoy my meal. So I figured, what harm would it do to have one little (ok, fairly large) diet soda? Not to mention the cheese steak, ice cream and chocolate. Oh, yes. I didn't do just a little. I ate it ALL! And it was GOOD. Dare I say it was worth it?

Yes, for just one time, it was worth it. I am glad it was so good, because otherwise my agony this morning would not have been balanced. Just goes to prove that fast food would definitely not have been worth it. At least at the place we went to, everything was prepared on premises and was fresh. Cheese steak made from beef cooked on premises. Fresh mushrooms and peppers. French fries cut on premises (with the skins still on). As I said, YUM! If it had been boring stuff from MickyD's, I would have been so mad at myself!

Anyway, in between rushing to the bathroom and using peppermint for my headache, and drinking green tea, I realized why I felt so sick this morning. That was the first food I had eaten that I had not made (or knew how it was made, for example at a friend's house) in almost 2 months! Because I went so far off, I don't know if it was the soda, the food, the ice cream or even the pizza from the night before that caused it, or even a combo of all of it. I just know that all this work IS SO worth it!

Will I still indulge every so often? Yes. Will I go all-out like I did this weekend? NO! LOL I think once a month is a good goal - not to eat prepared foods (at home or out) more than once a month, and even so, in moderation. Here is a list of things I noticed are back today, that had gone away. (Why is it when something is annoying or hurting, you notice it all the time, but when it goes away, you don't notice?) Anyway, here's the list:

Irritable Bowel Syndrome
Headaches (and sometimes migraines)
Poor Attitude
Tiredness, even with enough sleep
Exhaustion, even with the simplest task
Ringing in the ears (this is still there, although not as loud. The research I have done suggests that eating healthy won't reverse tinnitus, but will halt it.)

That's enough, right? I don't have Lupus, like my mom does, and I am praying that with conscious decisions of what goes in my mouth, I may be able to prevent it.

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Trial and Error

2011-01-29T18:11:00.004-05:00

Well, I am a few days into my journey. A few things I have noticed...
Food is not always just food
Additives and Preservatives are in EVERYTHING
Even if you can make your own, the pesticide is doing it's damage anyway.

I am a real downer today. I have heard 2 takes on that. First, that it could be the withdrawals, as MSG is an addictive substance. I am not too sure on that one, because I am not too sure I have completely eliminated it. The other is that I am starting to realize just how difficult this is going to be! That, I believe.

I wish I knew about this so much earlier in life. It would have been a much easier transition than now that I have a boatload of recipes that all have chemical laden stuff in them.

Tonight I am making meatloaf balls. Let's see...
Ground meat - I haven't started grinding my own yet, so I used some from the store.
breadcrumbs - I have about 3 canisters, maybe 4 downstairs, but they are a big offender (MSG and HFCS), so I made my own.
Pasta sauce - well I had already been making my own of that, I started a few weeks ago.
Grill seasoning - MSG - omit and add salt, pepper, onion powder and garlic powder.
Egg and milk, good.
Barbecue sauce. Hmmm. What now. I have 3 brands of barbecue sauce in my pantry. 2 of them have 3 kinds of MSG and one has 2 kinds. All have smoke flavor, which can contain MSG. Both have stabilizers which can have MSG and the third has Natural Flavorings, which can also contain MSG. I feel like I am playing mind games with food!

I could make my own barbecue sauce from ketchup, and notice that the ketchup contains natural flavorings! UGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!! I was seriously on the verge of tears.

Here is what I have decided. I will use up what I have. As I use it up, I will begin making my own. I can make ketchup from tomato paste, vinegar and a few other ingredients. From there I can make barbecue sauce by adding molasses, brown sugar and seasonings. It HAS to be safer than the stuff in the store, right?

Again, I wish I could grow all my own food, but it JUST ISN'T POSSIBLE! So for now, I will be using what I have as long as the MSG rates aren't through the roof, and then I will just not buy it again.

That's all for now. Thank you all for your comments, suggestions and ideas. Keep 'em comin, I need them!

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

PS - also with dinner were Sweet Potato Fries and rice, without the soy sauce (goodbye, dear friend!) LOL

Another Step - Giving up MSG

2011-01-27T20:11:00.002-05:00

I had NO IDEA that there was MSG in almost everything. It hides itself in so many things, and it's hard to track. I hear it can even be in our fruits.

I can't go as far as to grow all my own food, I just don't have that ability (or the space!) However, I can make better choices for my family. MSG is just one of a number of additives we will hopefully give up this year, including aspartame, high fructose corn syrup (and other modified corn products). This list is not extensive, but a starting point.

I am finding this HARD! First of all, I have a pantry of food, most of which contain offending products. Sugar free products, soups, mixes, even dried potatoes all contain at least one of the things on my list. So I need a starting point. I can't go and throw away (or donate) all of the food in my pantry, we just don't have the funds available to replace all of it! However, as we eat, I am going to replace the food with better choices. Peanut butter does not need to have 3 kinds of sugar and MSG in it!

I am not sure I can afford to make everything myself, not to mention the time involved. I am sure I can budget my time more effectively, however this is something I am not used to. I will have to re-learn how to prepare food for my family.

Has anyone done this? I would love to hear recipes, stories on becoming healthier, how you replaced your food stores, etc.

Follow me on my journey to health, would ya?
God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Reading Food Packaging Labels

2011-01-24T22:30:00.002-05:00

Lately I have taken to reading the ingredient labels on the foods in my house. Some of them, after having read the ingredients, I just want to throw away! I can't believe I let this slip!! On a package of breadcrumbs, it has more unpronouncable ingredients than I care to count, in addition to several types of sugar. I understand some of that went into baking the bread that the crumbs come from, but I have made bread - I don't use that much sugar!

I used to just check the informational numbers, like trans fats and sodium, but now I may end up making a LOT of our food from scratch because I can't believe what's in this stuff.

A can of peas we ate today had an ingredient list. Peas, water, sugar, salt. Sugar in peas? I understand the salt, although I could live without it, but sugar?

Pancake mix has HFCS in it? Why? Ketchup with msg? Why? So.... I will be much more vigilant in what I bring home from now on.

As you know, we have been trying to eat healthier - eliminating fast foods, and over processed foods. However I never realized that some "ingredients" had ingredients! I thought ketchup and breadcrumbs were just things you bought. I had some convenience foods on hand so I don't go crazy, and I might still keep some on hand, but not before reading the ingredient lists to make sure I know what is going into our bodies.

I know there is no way to truly know everything we eat - I buy meat and produce from the store and I have never seen the farms it comes from. However, what I can control is ingredients in the foods I make. So I may have a lot less time on my hands than I already do!

Has anyone else taken up a more simplistic way of eating, after being a convenience foods junkie? How did you do it?

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Wow, Almost a Month!

2011-01-07T18:24:00.003-05:00

I don't think I have ever gone that long without a post. Things around here have been busy to say the least. First, I have become a leader at my church, and that takes up quite a bit of my time. My mom moved in with us, and that takes up a little time. My daughter is at the 2nd grade level now, my middle son is doing a modified kindergarten, and my littlest is doing preschool a few days a week. That takes up tons of time.

Aside from all that, the holidays were more time consuming than usual this year. We were travelling for Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years. Usually, we travel for one, my in laws come for one, and my sister comes for one. This year, due to circumstances beyond my control, we travelled for all three. Twice one state over, and once a few states away. Time consuming, but fun ;)

Now that the holidays are over, I have been keeping busy homeschooling, taking care of the house (my husband has been unable to travel home), homeschooling, among other things. Lets see... what else did I want to update you on?

Oh!!! My family and I decided to give up fast food entirely, and preservatives as much as we are able. I am telling you, I already feel better! I have digestive problems, as do my mom and daughter. My son had been exhibiting behavioral issues. I did some research, and preservatives came up for both, so what can it hurt but time? So we have been eating healthier. Tonight, our dinner was homemade pasta with meatballs and sauce :)

That's it for now. I will try to continue regular updates, and to share about how I am getting on. Also, please stop by my other blog where I share coupon experiences, recipes, etc.

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Ebb and Flow

2010-12-11T22:34:00.002-05:00

I didn't know what else to call this post. A talk about finances doesn't have such a nice ring to it :) I want to chat with you a few minutes about the general ebb and flow of money - or anything else tangible.

Right now, we are starting to have more food on hand than usual. We are preparing for the winter, when snow and ice will sometimes keep us from getting to the store. It will also keep me from wanting to go out even when I could. Also, my husband doesn't make as much in the winter, so if he has a bad week or two, we are stocked and don't need to buy anything.

Now, obviously just because I have more food in the house than usual doesn't mean we can over-eat or waste anything. This food has to last us through a few potentially bad weeks. I call this hedging the paycheck. :)

The same goes for when we have a good week, or get money for some reason or another. We are NOT rich. Not to mention that things happen. Car parts break. Houses need repair. People get sick. So any extra money we get during good times gets saved for when things go wrong.

As I have mentioned before, we don't have credit cards. We do, unfortunately have a car payment and a mortgage. I don't know if we would have ever had a house without a mortgage, but I wish we hadn't bought the car on loan. What we are doing now is hedging against the eventual breakdown of my husband's car. It's old, and breaks down from time to time, as you have read on here. I save money to fix it. Once my car is paid off, we will keep paying that money, to ourselves, to get a new (to him) car for my husband.

People ask why I keep all my old stuff, when I have the money for new. "But I don't," I explain. That money is already set aside for something else. The money is only to be used for that purpose. Yes, my towels are old. But they are towels - they still absorb water - isn't that the point of towels. They aren't ratty or torn or not usable. (Not sayin there's something wrong with torn if it's what you have - as long as you don't go into debt to buy new ones :) ) So let's say I spent money on towels. Now I get sick and need to go to the doctor. I need $50 to see the Nurse Practitioner. I don't have $50, but I do have new towels!

I say these things for a reason. I recently learned that not everyone knows this stuff. Just like cooking was originally a task to learn for me, finances is a task that needs to be learned by others. I hope that if you are someone to whom finances don't come easily that I have sparked your knowledge and you will seriously take a look at what you spend and what you spend it on, and decide if you are doing best for your family for the future and also if you are being a good steward of your money.

I think that we should try to live within our means, and that means saving for the lean times. I also believe that a little fun and relaxation is in order from time to time, and I plan for that, too. It will look different for every family. Some have the resources to save for a vacation in Cancun. I have the resources to save for a trip to McDonalds happymeals at the playplace :) It's a good time, my kids have fun, I get to relax - and it works for us. Next year I want to try to save for a camping trip as a vacation, but also we plan to travel to see my dad. Maybe we will combine the two, and drive to see my dad, camping where we would have needed a hotel :)

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

What I've Been Up To

2010-11-27T18:45:00.002-05:00

I know I haven't been posting regularly - or even semi-regularly. For that, I apologize. However I have been a bit stressed lately. We had a fairly stressful thanksgiving. My mom-in-law is in the hospital, and they won't be letting her go home. She is going straight from there into a nursing home. Her cancer is causing her to have physical problems that just can't be cared for at home. So we spent the holiday back and forth to the hospital so she wouldn't be alone. The whole family took "shifts" and also took turns in the kitchen so everyone got a chance to visit.

We are home now, and are trying to iron out some issues here. Suffice it to say I don't want to rant and vent something here that I will be regretful to have posted, so I will leave that part out.

Other than that, church resumes this Sunday, after it being closed this week. Sunday service, Tuesday Morning MOPS, Wednesday Evening Step Study, Friday Night Celebrate Recovery, and Sunday service once again. Busy, busy, busy (which sure beats cooped up in the house all winter!)

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Here I am Aain...

2010-11-22T18:25:00.003-05:00

Crazy as usual! It seems to be that time of year. Everyone's running crazy right now. I haven't even started thinking about Christmas.... so far it's just Thanksgiving. Thankfully all the big events at church are over, and it's just getting ready for our family Thanksgiving.

Today, however I was babysitting for a friend. Her daughter wasn't feeling well, so she couldn't bring her to day-care. As we have all also been under the weather, it wasn't a risk to get my kids sick, you know? :) and I am already watching 3, what's one more? We skipped school today (intentionally) because I knew we would be doing this - then I realized what week it was, and decided to take off the whole week,

Tomorrow I have to get all my lists together. I am hosting, but at someone else's house. So I have a lot of stuff to bring. Not only our stuff for three days, but also most of the food. I need lists - it's the only way. :) Also, we have to bake the pies tomorrow.

Then Wednesday morning, I will pack up our stuff, and we will leave sometime late morning or early afternoon. We will arrive at our destination just before dinner, and we will have hors-de-vours or otherwise known as orderves. I know, my spelling here is bad... LOL

Then Thursday I will get started - turkey, mashed potatoes, candied yams, corn, broccoli, rolls, gravy, etc. I know breakfast will be in there somewhere, I just don't know what yet! LOL We traditionally eat around 2 or 3 pm, and have sandwiches for dinner, so I don't have to worry about cooking for lunch.

Then Friday morning, we will have breakfast with the family and head out right after, getting home sometime mid-afternoon or so. At that point, it's the unpacking and hopefully relaxing. This weekend is a light one for me. I don't plan on going out shopping except the grocery store on Saturday, so not much to worry about there. Sunday I am a regular church attendee - no shifts for me to work this Sunday.

Then Monday, it's back to normal for a few weeks until Christmas. Just the usual crazy! LOL How do things look for your Thanksgiving?

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Not Much to Say

2010-11-15T13:38:00.002-05:00

Things here are plugging along. I have joined the Ministry Leadership in my church, and it really takes up more time than you would think. :) I enjoy doing it, and the kids like to learn about what I am doing in the church. Recently I gave a lesson at our Celebrate Recovery group, and I am giving my second lesson at MOPS. It seems I may have been given a gift of teaching :)

On the home front, school is going ok. Aside from math, my daughter is really enjoying her lessons. Math is the biggie. It takes between an hour and an hour and a half just to do 2 math pages. The thing is, she KNOWS the answers. She's GOOD at it. But she digs in her heels and refuses. Tomorrow I am implementing a new rule. She gets a half hour for math. (It really should take her less than 20, so an extra 10 for posterity). Then, we move on. Whatever she doesn't finish becomes homework after school, as to not hold up the rest of the house with her not wanting to do the work.

My mom is here with us. We are working on fixing up a room downstairs for her. She is doing well - better than the last time I saw her. Her health is improving, and with that her mood also improves :) The only thing she is having a difficult time with is our non-consumption way of life. She is used to the use and throw away society as a rule, and we are more of a "think of another use for that" kinda family. So we are learning to make concessions to each other.

Not much else. Truthfully, I haven't even been reading blogs right now. I wish I could say I am going to catch up some-time soon, but with the way things are now, time is tight. If I visit your blog, I will be sure to leave you a comment!

God Bless.
One Christian Mom

Writer's Block

2010-10-26T20:17:00.002-04:00

Every day I think of something I want to post on the blog. Then in the evening when I log on, I can't remember what it was I wanted to say! Is that what writer's block is? So, this post is going to be a hodge-podge of the last couple of days - and backwards, to boot!

Today I had a friend and her kids over. It's been a long time since I did that. It was an actual planned playdate (or that was our excuse, anyway). Ever since my friend moved away about 2 years ago, I have had a hard time with friendships. Not because I don't call people my friend - I have plenty of people at my church I call friend. I go to their houses, we go to the park, we hang out at church. But I always feel self-conscious about my home, about my hospitality. Well, last week, I made the "plunge" and invited a friend over. And today we had fun :)

This weekend, we went for a visit to the in-laws. We brought the kids pumpkin picking, and they had a cake for the boys who's birthdays are both in October.

Friday I was asked at Celebrate Recovery to start helping to lead meetings. I kinda edged myself into leadership by opening a step study group on Wednesdays, which was much needed. However until now, that didn't also extend to Friday night group meetings. Wednesday night meetings are a small gathering of 4 other women - a "small group". Friday is the entire meeting. They want me to help lead them - in 3 weeks I will be the facilitator for the entire meeting - presenting a lesson and everything. Thankfully there is a leader's guide!

Thursday - well, I am not sure I remember that far back! HA. Anyway, that is what we have been up to. And I am sure that as soon as I hit that "post" button, I will again remember what it was I wanted to post about. :)

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

It's Working!

2010-10-21T20:49:00.002-04:00

Well, last night was another late night, but it was a church night. It was still better than it used to be, though. My kids went to bed right as we arrived home, which is a REAL improvement. They are finding less and less reasons to argue with me. So pj's, story, lights out. One complaint. It was about 9:30 when lights went out. I never realized how much later bedtime was when we went to church. They slept in a little today, but not by much. They are still getting up at night, but I bring them straight back to bed - or in my middle son's case, to the bathroom (whether or not he asks) and back to bed.

Today was a good day. I posted rules up in the house :) One is called behavior list. It was basically meant as a reminder to myself on how to discipline effectively. No yelling is at the top of the list. Don't argue is another. Timeouts are quiet is another one. My daughter is becoming a budding reader, and she read the list. She said, "Mommy, these rules say you can't yell at us!" I said, "Yes, and they also say no arguing!" She LOVES the rules. She started to argue with me, and I showed her the rules and she said, "I don't want a time-out," to which I said, "OK, so please do what I asked in a pleasant manner." AND SHE DID! HA!

So I tried my hand at another list. I made a "mealtimes" rules sheet. My house is going to have rules sheets hung up all over the place :) Anyway, it says things like wash your hands, bring place mat to table, sit nicely in chair, don't get up unless you ask for permission, no yelling at the table, etc. Well, I can't say dinner was a dream, my son tried his hand at all manner of play to get emphasis off the fact that he wasn't eating. However it was better than normal. My daughter is really feeding off of these rules sheets. I think I may even set one up for bedtime, even though we have started a routine, maybe the list will firm it up.

I HATED lists as a kid. My mom had checklists for everything. How to brush your teeth. How to get ready for school in the morning. Etc. I hated them. I always said I would never make my kids do that. And now I have a kid who thrives on them! HA. Don't they say everything skips a generation, and that's why grandmas and grandkids get along so well? Well, that and that most grandparents can give the kids back at the end of the day!

So things are starting to look up around here, once again. Please remind me of this if I start to fall again....

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

9:30 is better than 10:30!

2010-10-20T17:01:00.003-04:00

Last night, the battle ended at 9:30 pm. We started on time (almost) and began with a bath. Next up was pj's, and brushing teeth. Last but not least was the story. Honestly, it was probably too funny, they were laughing hysterically when it came for lights out. I turned out the lights, and each one got up in turn. I kissed them on the head, led them back to the bed and put them back in. There was some playing initially, which I was ignoring per the "technique" in the book I am reading. They can do anything they want to quietly as long as they stay in bed.

The idea is that if they are quiet in their beds they will eventually fall asleep. It is dark, it is quiet, they are resting, they will sleep. This did work for the boys. Almost immediately, my middle son was asleep. After a bit of protesting, my youngest was sleeping. My daughter got out of bed 4 times more. She cried, she protested, she tried to fight me. Around 9:20 or so was the last time she came out to get me. By 9:45 I was able to hook up her tube. I wait until she is asleep to hook her up because that becomes just one more thing for her to complain about and get up and call me for. So I know she fell asleep between 9:20 and 9:45. Better than 10:30 for sure!

Tonight will be a little different. As I said, my mom does not arrive until next Thursday, and I cannot cancel the Wednesday night classes until then. So I will try to finish early, but even still, I will not have them home until 9pm. We will brush our teeth (of course) before we go, and lay out our jammies. When we get home, I will leave the lights dim. We will get changed and I will read a story. Then it will be lights out. Hopefully, and with a bit of prayer, this will work.

School went well today. I am guessing that it was because of the fact that they were all well-rested! Also, they did try to give me a bit of attitude today after school, but I have implemented tomato staking again, so the attitudes have not lasted long because I am catching them as they happen, rather than after the fact.

It's almost dinner time, so I have to go! :) Hope to hear how you all are doing - I will go blog-hopping tonight.
God Bless,
One Christian Mom

A Speaking Engagement (and more)

2010-10-19T15:23:00.003-04:00

Ok, ok - it wasn't a real speaking engagement, but still, it was ME getting up in front of a group of people who actually wanted to hear what I had to say! I gave a "mini-coupon course" for the ladies at our MOPS meeting today.

Recently I have noticed a lot of the ladies talking about how it is getting harder and harder to feed their families, and that their husbands are loosing hours, and how they don't want to be "forced" to go back to work. So we are doing a mini-series on budgeting/good stewardship. Today we focused mainly on food, but also talked about need vs. want and also using what God has given you with Him in mind. Does your purchase glorify Him in some way? Will those new skirts bring glory to Him in how you present yourself (assuming, of course that you need them and are not just buying them because you want them)? Will that new mixer help you make baked goods for the less fortunate, and can you get a used one cheaper or maybe even freecycle, then save the money you would have spent to use on food for the pantry, or to give to missions?

These are just a few ideas I wanted to share with you. Have you all seen my coupon blog? It's linked through this one, but the link is http://www.makingcentsofcoupons.blogspot.com/. I have a virtual coupon course that may help anyone wanting to get started out in the world of coupons.

Also, last night was a DISASTER, which just firmed up my resolve to get started with the new bedtime tonight. Right now (at 3:30 in the afternoon) they are asking for baths. They know I have something in mind, and they are trying to thwart it already. I need to hold firm to my resolve. I need to start tonight off fresh, to "get it right" so we can start the way I feel we should be. I want to do dinner, bath, teeth, book and bed. I want no TV this evening. Usually we watch TV in the late afternoon, and I want that to stop. I want our routine to be in place by the time my mom gets here.

Oh, and I heard from God today. Not in an audible way, like "Hey, over here, it's me, God." HAHA I think I would loose my mind! But both my mom and a leader for the Celebrate Recovery contacted me today. My mom said she wants to put the kids to bed 2x a week, and I should just let her know when that should be (hello, Wednesdays and Fridays? it just works) and then the CR leader contacted me and said they needed another small group leader for Friday nights and they prayed on it and decided they should ask me. So I may get the proverbial "cake and eat it, too," and probably because I stayed faithful, and put my family first.

God is good, all the time!
I am still praying, making sure this is the right answer before I make another commitment, but it really just seems right. We decided to drop the group therapy, it wasn't a good fit for us, and after much prayer and advisement we decided it was best not to go. Everything else is now falling into place!

God Bless.
One Christian Mom

In Need of a Bedtime Routine

2010-10-18T20:00:00.003-04:00

OK, so thing one will be getting a new bedtime routine in place. Most people say that the "right" way to start a bedtime routine is with a bath. Here's the thing, and don't get on me about it, please. We don't bathe the kids every night unless they really need it. We bathe them every other night. The air is dry here over the winter because of the coal heat, and it really bothers the skin to bathe every night. Not to mention the cost of heating the water for three baths every night. So, bath time can start the bedtime routine every other night.

For the rest of the week, I need to find a routine that works. I figure that on bath nights, we will start baths right after dinner to get them all done before we start bedtime, so we can start bedtime at the same time every night. That would put dinner around 5:30 pm, baths around 6:30 pm - 7:30 or so. Which is exactly when I want to start bedtime. The kids seem to settle best right around 8pm, so I am hoping that by starting bedtime at 7:30, it will give us a half hour to put on PJ's, brush teeth, read a story or two, and get tucked in. 8pm will be lights out.

That's when the real fun will start. I can GUARANTEE that at least one (if not all three) kids will get back up. You see, right now I sit in a rocking chair as the kids fall asleep. But that's not working out so well for me. I need time alone. Call me crazy or selfish (others have), but I just don't function as well if I have not been left alone a little bit. I find myself awake far after my bedtime just trying to cram some reading, needlepoint or computer time in.

So as each kid gets up, in turn I will quietly walk them back to bed. Then they may cry, ask for stuff, claim they are sick, need to go potty, whatever. I know you all know this already, but somehow typing things out has been helping me put them in motion. So I will quietly address the needs that have to be met (potty, feeling for temperature) and ignoring the rest (and not saying you already had a drink of water). Then they will unwillingly (or hopefully willingly) get back into bed and maybe not get back out again? I mean eventually they will have to go to sleep, right?

So this is my plan. I am hoping for the best, expecting the worst, and will start tomorrow ;) I would have started tonight, but I didn't think of it soon enough, and time has passed; I am currently sitting in said rocking chair waiting for them to fall asleep!

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Decisions, Decisions.

2010-10-17T15:10:00.004-04:00

It seems I have some decisions to make. I finally found a book I have been wanting to read for a long time through inter library loan (why didn't I think of that in the first place?) and it's called "Ask Supernanny" by Jo Frost. Some of you may have seen her show, it's on ABC. The show is about this woman who has 16 years or so of experience as a nanny, and she goes from home to home helping parents regain their households. When I first started on my blogging journey, I really wanted this woman to come to my home! When we decided we wanted to homeschool, many thought we were crazy because my daughter was still "ruling the roost" so to speak. I know there were considerations for that, and we have come a long way, but we still have some growing to do.

That's where the book comes in. I want solutions to mealtimes and bedtime. I feel like if we can batten down those two things, the rest will follow. I suspect a lot of my daughter's attitude issues stem around either tiredness or hunger. When I started reading "Nanny Jo"'s book, she says to do an evaluation of your family, and to see where the most work needs to be done. I noticed 2 things. Bedtime and mealtime are ALWAYS issues. Everything else that becomes an issue is only an issue sometimes, and even then, it's sporadic. So these are the areas that need the most attention.

The next thing she says I need to do is establish routine. I won't tell you any more of the book, because I don't want 1) to give up all her tips and tricks and 2) if you need it, you will read it and if you don't need it, then awesome!!! But these two points are important to my post, which is why I tell them to you. Evaluation and routine.

The routine part is where I get stuck. It's ALWAYS where I get stuck. I have too many obligations. I have morning and evening obligations. My morning obligations are earlier than we can get out of the house in the morning and the evening ones keep us out after bedtime. So I have some decisions to make. I think I have settled it in my mind, however I still need to contact my mom on this, as she will have some say in whether or not this is going to work (as she will be involved.) ;)

I know, this post is disjointed today, and for that I apologize. But I feel like, after reading the chapter on routine, that I am thinking more clearly than I have in a long time. I know some of you have said that in order to make my family run more smoothly, I need to give up some obligations and you were right. I just didn't understand the why of it. You know, sometimes I need to be hit with the proverbial 2x4 in order to "get it".

So, my thought is this. I will keep the kids involved in the stuff we have in the mornings. Church is in the morning, as is MOPS, and both activities are beneficial to the kids. The other 2 obligations I have are in the evenings. They are the Wednesday night step study, and Friday night celebrate recovery. I cannot stop the Wednesday night one, I made a personal commitment to the ladies and I don't want to break it. It would be akin to saying, "I know I said I would help you in your recovery, but I can't, so sorry." I just can't do that. However, my mom will be coming to live with us at the end of this month, and she doesn't need to attend the Wednesday nights. She could put the kids to bed at their assigned bedtime, making routine easier to establish.

That just leaves the Friday nights. I have 3 options so far as I can see. 1 is to quit altogether. I really don't want to, but if it's for the good of my family, I will. 2 is to let my mom do bedtime 2 nights a week. I need to see how she feels about this. 3 is to go every other or every 3rd week, and just let the kids stay up once a month or once every other week. This may be a way to keep me going and involved, give flexibility to the routine, and give my mom some space every so often.

This way, I can put the kids to bed by 7:30 or 8pm every night and expect them to be up around 7am. This will do a few things for us...
1. I hear that kids do better when their bedtime is earlier, no matter how much they sleep. Meaning if they go to bed at 10pm and sleep 9 hours, they aren't as rested as if they went to bed at 8pm and slept 9 hours.
2. If we rise earlier, we can get through school by lunchtime, opening our afternoons up to library trips, park trips, field trips - all the things we have been missing out on by waking late each day.
3. It might make me a morning person again. I used to be, but being up so late every night arguing with the kids over going to bed has made a grumpy mommy in the morning. I can remember a time when I woke up and was able to get out of bed without rolling over first!

I just hope that by going to bed at 7:30 or 8pm, they aren't up at 6am!

I have never been able to stick to a routine before. I think i have realized that this is because we have never had a set bedtime. Nanny Jo was stating in the book that without set sleep and wake times, the rest of the routine is nullified. If sleep and wake is different each day, there can be no flow to the days, and the kids get mixed up easily. I think I was getting mixed up easily, too!

More on the development of our new and hopefully implementable routine to come!

God bless!
One Christian Mom

A Birthday Today! (and 2 other things on my mind) :)

2010-10-11T10:45:00.004-04:00

One of my babies turns 5 years old today! Where does the time go? Today, instead of buying shoes, he has decided he would like to go to the park! What??? He has his own mind, and doesn't want to do what I want to do? Oh, my - he is growing up! LOL So we will be going to the park today and meeting up with some friends. Shoes can wait. It's a novelty to be able to go to the park on his birthday, usually by now the temps are actually cold enough for snow. But this year it will be near (if not at) 70 degrees, perfect park weather. We are just waiting - it's still cold in the am here, but after lunch should be perfect. Now if I could just keep him busy 'till then... ;)

On another note, I am loving my new "clean" house. I put clean in quotations because it is not as if my house is a museum where there is nothing on tables or floors, however it is easier to get it that way. :) Just earlier, my 2 (almost 3) year old decided to dump out the toys from the toybox. When it was time to clean up, all of them just went back in! There aren't toys all over the house where pieces get everywhere and things get all mixed up. Also, being that we are straightening up every evening (or almost every evening), things don't get to that catastrophe point.

And lastly for now, I notice a few people closing their blogs recently, or just refraining from posting anything new. This saddens me, as I enjoy following you and your families and your journeys. So just know, if you still read mine, that I miss yours! :)

God Bless - and here's to a wonderful day!
One Christian Mom

A Praise Report

2010-10-08T14:30:00.003-04:00

No, today has not been fantastic, but it has Definitely been better than the last couple of days. First of all, it's a nice day today. No rain, a few clouds, and nice enough to spend some time outside.

Second, my daughter actually ASKED to do school today. We were having a late start, as we didn't clean up before bed last night, so we had to clean up this morning before school. She said, "Mom, are we going to do school today, because I really want to learn more about space." :) I hadn't planned on doing science, but with a quick switch, science was first on the agenda. I used to save "the best for last" but I found she is much more motivated if she does something she likes first.

Third, my dad isn't mad at me for not taking a trip I didn't think I could take. This sounds funny, but my sister wanted me to come to visit her while my dad was going to be there, and I just can't figure a way to make it work. She is upset, but ok about it. I thought my dad would be mad, but he's ok with it, too. I think standing up for myself is helping people to respect me! We are going down to see my dad next week - a much more do-able trip :)

And lastly, my husband and I are starting to work together and talk about how best to get the kids "back in line". They are not completely out of control, but on the days I am having a hard time getting a handle on them, it's pure panic and anger for me. I talked to him about it two nights ago, and rather than him saying his usual, "whatever you think is best" he actually had some ideas for me that sound like they may work. What he doesn't know yet is he will help me implement them this weekend :) Well, as long as he is agreeable to it.

That's it for today. I didn't get much sleep again last night, I really need to work on knowing that I will be sleepless for a few nights and just do sleep training with my kids. I just don't know if I am strong enough to do it on my own. Maybe that is why I haven't implemented anything yet - fear of failure. I should just write something out, and then say I am going to stick to it. How do you make a baby stay in his bed without using tape? :)

Until next time, God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Overextended

2010-10-05T17:55:00.002-04:00

I was telling a friend yesterday that I am feeling overextended. Another friend joined in the conversation, and I got two distinct points of view on the subject. Now it's my turn - to pray! :)

Mondays - I have finally been able to get my daughter into group therapy, which is something we have been striving for since she was 4. Well, maybe not group therapy per se, but therapy as a whole - and group was approved, so group it is! It's an hour and a half away, and it's every week for two months. So that's one.

Tuesdays - Then we have MOPS and steering committee - which is the MOPS leadership. I thought I could do this one - I have felt called to help "steer" for about a year, but when I tried last year, my kids were just too needy with all we were going through. This year seemed like a perfect time to start. Except for the fact that it is every Tuesday morning. Every other Tuesday for the meetings and the other every other for the leadership meetings. That's two.

Wednesdays - I was asked to facilitate a "step study" for Celebrate Recovery, which is basically a small group which meets in order to talk more in depth about the steps for recovery, talk about what is going on in our lives, how we have grown and where we still need work, etc. This is every Wednesday night. That's three.

Thursdays - I am getting a reprieve here. This week is our last Thursday meeting at church as far as I know. So that's not four :)

Fridays - Celebrate Recovery - the program that helped me "launch" my new relationship with Christ, helped me heal from everything I went through and am still going through, and to whom I owe my life. Seriously, without this group, I may possibly be sitting on the side of a road somewhere with the clothes on my back in tears of "what could have been", or worse. So I am not giving that up! That's four.

Ok - so then we have my mom coming at the end of October, 4 birthdays in October, my dad moving away in October. That's five. Oh, and my sister wants us to come and visit, which I am not sure we will be able to do.

November - on top of all my meetings and such, we have Thanksgiving, which I am expected to host, either here or at my in-laws depending on how my mom-in-law is feeling (which I am ok with). so that's six.

December. I feel like I am getting a reprieve here. It seems that group will be over, so it will be the first Tuesday (and then mops is off until 3rd week of Jan), the 1st and 2nd Wednesday (then step will be off until 1st week of Jan), and Fridays at that point. Oh, and Christmas, which I also host.

Add to that homeschooling, and the rest of the regular every day stuff, and I am not sure I can do it. Now that you have seen it all out on paper, here's the advice I received:

1. You can do All things through Christ who gives you strength, was the basis for the first friend's advice. I can do it, I can do it all and I can do it all well with prayer.

2. I need to thin it out. Find out what is not necessary and back out of commitments until I no longer feel overextended.

I am not sure either is the answer!
Thoughts/feelings welcome :)
God Bless!
One Christian Mom
PS - I know this blog and my writings have taken a turn lately, more introspective and maybe even not as positive as I would like it to be, but one thing I always promised is that I would try to keep it as real as I am :) So what you see is what I am going through at any given moment!

Getting Down The Long Road

2010-10-03T18:04:00.003-04:00

I feel like we are getting somewhere. I am sorry for my vent yesterday. Thank you, Q for bringing me back :) I appreciate your insight and your sound tools for getting my home back in order. I realized upon re-reading my post, that I had gone back to my traditional style of venting in my writing rather than what I am trying to become.

I want this blog to be 2 things. One- to be an encouragement to others. Despite my situation, despite my wrestling with depression, despite being me :) I am still able to minister to others, feel God move in my life (in an increasingly great way) and put aside my fears/apprehensions/depressions and move forward to make friendships (real life and online). I hate that - the distinguishing between "real life" and "online life". Although I have never met any of you in "real life", that doesn't make you all any less "real" to me. You are friends, tried and true, encouraging, bible believing, parent guru, homeschooling REAL women!

Anyway, I am sorry for reverting to my traditional vent-style post, and will try not to do it again. If I am having issues, I will ask directed questions, rather than vent problems. I will explain issues rather than emote emotions :) And I will continue to place testimonies of God's movement in my life here.

Like today. Although not a complete angel, my daughter was markedly better today than yesterday. It's possibly the stress of letting go, but today we learned that it is not acceptable, however talking about it calmly is. We had a pleasant day, starting with church and ending with a picnic. We learned that although "stuff" is fun, you can have fun without commercialism. My kids learned a vocabulary word today :)

My almost 3 year old son, on the other hand.... ;) He needs to be staked in a bad way. I am going to start that tomorrow. I will stake all of them, but he will not leave my side. This should prove interesting ;)

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

The Great War

2010-10-02T13:53:00.003-04:00

My daughter and I just had a yelling match, and I hate it. I hate turning into this person. She is screaming at me because she doesn't feel she should have to clean up the mess she said she didn't make. I am yelling because I am telling her, just one more time, that if it isn't picked up in 5 minutes, I am throwing it out. She screams back that I can't throw away her toys because she didn't make the mess. I am telling her I don't care who made the mess, it's her toy and she needs to pick it up. She says I hate her and slams her door. Where do I go from here. Do I throw the toy away as promised? I am half believing she didn't make the mess. I was cooking lunch, and I am under the impression her brother took out her toy and made a mess with it. I have no way of knowing for sure, but I am so tired of this.

I am tired of the messes, I am tired of the attitude. I am tired of being tired (quite literally, read my sleep post below.) I am reacting rather than responding, and I know that's a problem. But I don't know what to do. I am out of room to store things downstairs, so I couldn't conceivably take all their toys away until they start acting better.

She is still screaming. It seems to be one of the few things she has done over the past few days. Ever since the doctor said she was gaining weight, she has stopped eating, playing, respecting me. She screams. She screams over school work (she will do it, but not until we have had an altercation.) She screams over cleaning, saying she never plays anyway, so why should she clean (not a true statement). She screams over food, and all through dinner. It's getting to the point where I would like to put her in school just to get a break, but I know that's not the answer.

Any/all suggestions welcome. Please remember I am tired, getting sick and not entirely myself. In other words, constructive criticism, not negativity. Thank you ;)

God Bless
One Christian Mom

When It Rains, It Pours

2010-09-28T19:21:00.002-04:00

Literally and figuratively. But in such a GOOD way! God truly answers prayer, even when you feel like your prayers are going unanswered, He still answers them. Today, 3 of my prayers were answered.

1. MY DAUGHTER GAINED WEIGHT! I want to shout it from the rooftops! SHE GAINED WEIGHT! can I say it again?! I mean, just wow. Not a little weight. Not a few ounces. Not a, "Well at least she didn't loose weight." I mean 3 lbs in a month. More than a year's worth of weight combined all in one itty bitty (albeit stressful) month! God is good.

2. MY HUSBAND FIXED HIS TRUCK, and it PASSED inspection. Can I say it again? I GOT MY VAN BACK! I thought I was being selfish with the whole transportation thing, but I prayed anyway. God knows our heart's desire, and he knew I didn't want to burden others with our 4 and 5 hour trips to the doctor, inconveniencing someone for a half hour after church to get us and our car seats home at 10pm, and whatnot. So, God gave my husband the ability to fix it, and it passed inspection. God is good!

3. IT'S RAINING! We have been in a drought for the end of summer. It hasn't rained this little in 17 years, and although it has been nice for the summer to be able to go outside every day and whatnot, the authorities were starting to get worried about dry wells. Well, today it hasn't stopped raining, and there is rain in the forecast for the next few days. YEAH! God is GOOD!

Rejoice and Praise God with me! :)

God Bless.
One Christian Mom

Goal Setting

2010-09-27T17:23:00.002-04:00

I gave this mini-speech at a MOPS meeting, and thought I would share here.

I know when most people think about setting goals, they are thinking about “what do I want to do with my life” or “where do I want to be in 5 years” or maybe even “What can I do to get a raise”. My goals right now are a bit different, as yours might be. In this stage of life, and with the path I have chosen of homeschooling, my goals are just, well, different. My long term goals right now are to get my kids educated while keeping my house clean, keeping everyone fed, and making sure they grow up with a firm foundation in Christ. Others are in different parts of their lives right now, or maybe have different goals, but these are mine. Here are some tips that will work for all goals.

So I take the larger goal of “housekeeping” and break it down into chunks that can be managed, and my way of doing that is daily, weekly, monthly and yearly.

For daily, they are:
get the kids fed, which as some of you know is an undertaking in my household.
Keep us and the house clean, which may involve laundry, dishes, and other daily tasks.
Do school.

Weekly goals may include changing bedding, cleaning the bathroom, making lesson and meal plans and other things.

Monthly goals may be projects like cleaning out closets, organizing toys, redefining curriculum, and what-not.

Yearly goals would be washing windows, getting the garden set up, painting the deck, etc.

There are worksheets I use for all of this - mostly printed on donnayoung.org. She has worksheets for calendar pages, to do lists, daily, monthly, yearly goal sheets and so on.

There are other types of goals I have, and they are spiritual ones. I think it is important to have spiritual goals. My Pastor said this week in his sermon that there is one thing we need to do for God to move in our life, and that is to take a step forward. Spiritual goals can be set up like physical goals, as long as you don’t try to take over God’s will :) My daily goals are to read the bible, pray, uplift someone, and try to follow God’s will. Weekly goals are attend classes (and MOPS) and church. Monthly goals are finish one book of the bible (sometimes I accomplish this, and sometimes I don’t, which means I need to re-evaluate the goal). I am not sure I can put out a yearly spiritual goal. I feel like if I put a time limit on what God wants for my life, that I am trying to take control, and I want God to be in control of my life. All things in God’s time. But a good yearly goal might be to journal weekly for a year, so you can see all the good things God did in a year. Another goal might be to read the new testament.

Sometimes goals need to be re-evaluated. For example, if we aren’t getting what I want done every day, I either need to re-think what order we do things in, or how much time I spend on each task, or maybe even eliminate a thing or two from my day. Maybe I could make a daily goal something weekly, or vice versa. Some people do all the laundry on one day of the week, and others do a load every day. I have tried it both ways, and found that if I plan to do all the laundry one day during the week, it doesn’t get done, then we are all looking for something to wear!

No matter what your goals, my feeling is that as long as you have a way of charting them, and knowing you are moving forward, you are one step closer to meeting them. And your goals are yours - they aren’t going to be exactly the same as anyone else’s, and that’s ok, too.

Vacation or No

2010-09-26T16:44:00.003-04:00

I have about a million topics running around in my head right now, but this is the most prevelant. My father is insistant that we start taking vacations. I know he is not the decision maker in my family anymore, that falls to my husband. However, he makes some points I am not sure about.

First, he is moving to a great vacation site. It will be somewhere we will want to go often, if possible. Problem is that it is about a day and a half drive from here. Maybe 18 or so hours. So it won't be able to happen often.

My husband gets a week a year - paid vacation. So if we went, we would have to wait for his vacation, which is supposed to be in October. As homeschoolers, it doesn't really matter when we go, and this vacation spot is good almost year-round.

My dad is saying that vacation is your rejuvination for the next year. Apparently you NEED a vacation in order to get through the next year with less stress. It's supposed to help you "refresh" and "de-stress" and all that other good stuff.

My problem is this: it's expensive. Like save all year and forgo a lot of fun stuff and even some needed stuff expensive. My dad said he would help us pay for it to come to see him, but even if he paid half, we would still have to save a serious amount of money.

I do want to go see my dad next year. I do like vacation. I don't like the stress that comes from "should I get the kids good shoes, or mediocre shoes so we can save the money for the trip" or "no, we can't go to mcdonalds for your birthday because we are saving for a trip" or "no, I can't buy myself new underwear because we are saving for a trip." You get the idea. That is the kind of budget we are on. The money my husband makes covers the bills MOST weeks. He gets bonuses that help cover the slow weeks. We are down to pretty much bare bones. The little left over is mostly saved for things like birthday treats and clothes for the kids when needed. I don't want to have to worry every time I spend a dollar.

So that's where I am at today. Trying to decide whether or not to start saving for something we don't need but might enjoy. Our other option is to visit my dad and not hit the tourist trap. It would cost significantly less, gas, tolls and food. Oh, and a hotel for one night. But still a lot less than buying passes to the "fun stuff". My dad will have fun stuff right in his development. Parks and a pool within walking distance. I could use my grocery shopping and cooking skills even on vacation :) I mean a vacation with kids is still work - new place, new schedule, etc. So what's adding cooking to that? I'm a mom, that's what I do.

Thoughts and ideas welcome :)
God Bless.
One Christian Mom

Funny Kid Moment

2010-09-21T20:49:00.003-04:00

OK, so I have been cleaning the toys all day (well, I have been directing my kids) and cleaning out all but just a few. I have "had it" with the clutter and something needed to be done. So we boxed up a good portion of all of the toys in one room. We are only a quarter of the way through the toys, but finished with one room. We left the "big" toys - those are the toys without pieces, like rocket ships, doodle n draws, etc. Those are all in a 55 gallon tote. All of the books are in a cabinet under the entertainment center. The videos and school books are all on a bookshelf. The other school and art supplies are in a roll-away cabinet drawer thingie. Then we left the toy table, and underneath it are two storage bins. In one are all the puzzles and games - things I WANT them to play with :) The other holds the toys they chose. They each got a cloth shopping bag to put any/all toys they want to keep. They decided this wasn't fair, but I decided it was :) They had to put anything they actually wanted to keep into those bags. I can tell you that by tomorrow, they will realize they didn't keep the toys they wanted, because I have some of their favorites all boxed up. They will get a chance to switch them up every so often.

The actual reason for this post was to state that after all that - after the arguing on why they didn't want to do this. The explaining on why they should not have to. The crying over toys "they would never see again" and all other such nonsense. What do I find my son playing with? A stick. He is making the stick talk, and pretending it has a friend. The stick's friend is his finger.

So tell me again why we have toys at all? :)

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Parenting In General

2010-09-19T18:37:00.003-04:00

What in the world is it we are all so afraid of? What causes us to not discipline our kids? What causes us to let them have tantrums, mouth off, not do as they are told, and all that other "stuff"?

Aside from the food issues in my home, which I was told will take some time by a very reputable and respected psychologist, things in my home had been getting better one day at a time. Sometimes we have better days than others - but truthfully - most of that revolves around my willingness and organization.

I don't seem to have the drive to push myself to do things that I don't want to. I never learned it. My days were scripted from the time I woke up to the time I went to sleep. There were lists of things we were allowed to do. There were lists of things we were allowed to eat. There was even a script next to the phone of appropriate things to say. However that is another post for another day - the "warnings of not letting your kids make decisions" or some other such thing. The point is that when our days don't go as planned, it's because of me, not the kids.

Over the past 2 days or so, I have noticed my kids are not respecting me. Do you know what I realized about 20 minutes ago? I WAS ALLOWING IT. I was not disciplining my kid who was disrespecting me at 2 years old, because I was afraid. Of what, you might ask? Well, that's just it. I am afraid of "THEM". Yes, the dreaded THEM.

Who are THEY that compose the dreaded THEM? Well, in this case, they are social workers, division of youth and family services, the neighbors. Anyone who might find fit to "report" me for disciplining my kid. No, I am not talking physical punishment. That is a debate I would rather not have.

"Them" is usually an imaginary person/people whom we fear for no apparent reason. For me, I fear the authorities because of issues I had as a child, because of issues my mom had as a child. Maybe her mom had those issues, too!

20 minutes ago, my 2 year old son tried to hit my 4 year old son because they both wanted the same truck. I told him to apologize, and he said no, stamped his foot, and crossed his arms at me while making a face. Usually, I would think: "Why is he being so disrespectful?" Well, this time, I was convicted with an answer: "Because you are LETTING him!"

So he was put in the corner. Over and over. And over. And over. Until he decided he would apologize to me for "having a mean face at me" and to his brother for trying to take the truck. Eventually, he did. It took about 15 minutes, but when it was over, he was content, if not happy.

What was I so afraid of?

God Bless!
One Christian Mom :)

One thing at a time

2010-09-17T13:21:00.002-04:00

I need to take my own advice. And the advice of others - Q and Harter come to mind :)

Whenever my kids get overwhelmed, I tell them to take it one step at a time. I

I am trying to get my daughter's "eating routine" established. This takes time and effort - I know it's hard to imagine, but getting everything set up beforehand, remembering to eat myself, executing the plan, etc - 3 times a day without relent can be exhausting. I need to have a better mind-set about this, but at least I am doing it. In the past, when something hard presented itself, I would say "It doesn't work" and move on. Not with the kids, but within my own life. Having kids teaches you things :)

I am trying to get our school year in gear. I know that this, along with the eating, is a non-issue. I HAVE to do it. We can't not do school, and I can't skimp on it. I don't want to. But this, too is exhausting. Setting up every night after the kids *finally* go to sleep. Cleaning up every day. Making sure they do everything they are supposed to - and getting the most out of it. I try to skip certain activities that seem pointless, but I am learning that it is these very activities that help them retain the information.

For example, today we learned about hieroglyphs. My daughter just isn't getting it. I was going to skip the "scroll" activity, where we make a scroll, but I think it will be important for her to understand the lesson. They also suggest "chipping" hieroglyphs into clay, but I just can't stand the idea for the mess right now. I am NOT organized enough for that today. Maybe tomorrow as a fun enrichment activity.

Then, I am trying to keep the house clean. Again, a non-issue. We cannot live in dirt. I understand that people think mess is ok, and maybe some can live this way, but I cannot. That's not true. I can. But I develop depression symptoms MUCH faster when the house is messy.

Also, I am trying to organize and purge. Part of the reason it is so hard for me to keep the place clean is because there is SO. Much. Stuff. see my previous post.

Then, there is the trying to make sure we all have fun every day. As silly as this sounds, I am more of a task-oriented person. I see fun as something you do after everything else is done. I need to STOP this. I need to see the fun in every day activities. We can all empty the dishwasher while making up a fun song to sing while doing it, and have a good time doing chores. Why don't I think of this while I am trying to keep the kids out of the kitchen so I can clean it?

Physical activity. What? I am supposed to be doing this, too? With the kids? Really??!! Ok. So I will add getting outside (without a book or computer) to my list. Wow, it's getting long.

Getting the kids to go to sleep at night is another problem. Add it to the list.

Sorting through the clothes and getting rid of what won't fit again next summer. Add it to the list. Wait - where will I put the rest of the summer clothes?

Ok, add emptying an area of the basement to put off-season clothes to that list.

Wait - in order to do that, I will have to decide where the stuff I am cleaning out will go - trips to the good-will. Finding places to put things I do want... etc.

As you can see, I get overwhelmed when I make lists. I would put ALL of these things to do on ONE day. Clean bathroom, do laundry, mop floor, keep kitchen clean, do school, sort clothes, clean area of basement, take a trip to goodwill, make new sleep routine, go over school plans for next week, etc, etc, etc. Then when I don't get stuff done, I get down on myself.

NO MORE. Yes, it's another one of those posts. ANOTHER new beginning. Didn't someone once say that God gives us a new beginning every day ;) Well, I am banking on that. I prayed this morning for the first time in a LONG time. I think God is trying to tell me a few things.
1. Stop wasting time. I am taking a break right now after lunch, but for the most part, I am leaving the computer off.
2. Do one thing at a time and finish it. usually I am thinking of so many things, I don't get any one thing done.
3. Let some things go. so what if the basement doesn't get cleaned out tomorrow. it's been that way for 5 years! one more month isn't going to hurt anyone.
4. GET IN THE WORD. I know why this came last. because I have been putting it off. I almost didn't hear it. I almost didn't want to hear it. But I did. And I should :)

That's it for now. Now I have to turn off the computer and get to the kitchen to clean up after lunch, and get back to the activity for today, so we can have some fun :D

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Need some serious storage space!

2010-09-16T16:45:00.002-04:00

Well, I do have some serious storage space, but it's all being used right now. What I need are some "totes" and some shelving - and some room for the shelving. My house has been overrun by toys. I just cannot handle it. Well, stuff in general. Here are the categories of stuff in my house:

1. Stuff people have given me that I no longer need, that I have a VERY difficult time getting rid of because someone gave it to me (or my kids). I have a houseful of Christmas, birthday, Easter, hostess, etc gifts in my home. I am not sure I have ever thrown a gift away. imagine that. I know gifts are supposed to be a blessing, however what do you do when a gift no longer has a use in your home? Serious question - please answer.

2. Stuff that still has value, however I no longer want. For example, I have some vases and cookie jars that I used to collect, and it is no longer practical to collect them - I have no where to display them, and I just don't enjoy them anymore. However they are not broken, chipped, etc - so they are not worthy of the garbage. I tried to sell them, but we can't have garage sales here and I don't know how to ship them, so they sit there on top of the various surfaces of my home collecting clutter and dust.

3. Paper I am afraid to throw away. I have paperwork from things that happened 3 years ago, I have bank statements for 7 or more years (I don't know why - everything is digital now.) I have instruction books on almost everyhting in my house. I have almost every drawing and craft my kids have ever made. etc.

4. Stuff that I actually want, but consider getting rid of because of all the other stuff in the house! I have movies I like to watch, games I like to play, kitchen gadgets I actually use - and they sometimes end up given away to make room for stuff people have given me. It's insane. It's a disorder. It's not "Hoarders" bad - we live in my home, but I am not happy about its contents.

5. Clothes that don't fit. I have clothes for myself in a few sizes, I should just get rid of most of them. Also, I have a lot of clothes I don't like but they DO fit. I am telling you, it's a disorder. One of those "what if I don't have any other clothes - but I get rid of these?'

6. TOYS! TOYS! TOYS! I have hardly purchased any toys for my kids. Ever. Yet we have 3 ROOMS and more full of toys. My husbands family is very generous, and they each get each child 3 or more toys every birthday, Christmas, Easter, Valentine's day, 4th of July, etc. My husband has parents, 4 brothers, an uncle, an aunt, and a good family friend. And EACH of them gives EACH of my kids something for almost EVERY holiday. It's insane!

7. ALL of my mom's stuff. When she moved, she left all her stuff here, and asked me to keep it for her. So it sits in my storage area. She moved here from a 2 bedroom apartment. She left here with nothing more than her clothes. That's a LOT of stuff.

8. Stuff I may need or want again someday. The proverbial someday. I have so. much. stuff. I just don't know how to get rid of anything. I have an old cd player that I never use except for once a year on christmas to play cd's without having the computer on. I have a snow sled that is still in it's case because as fun as it sounds, I never get off my butt to go outside in the cold weather and pull the kids on it. Etc.

I want to PURGE! and I don't know how. I am trying to work on one thing at a time, as a good friend suggested, but I get overwhelmed even with one task, as they are so big. For example, I want to work on toys today. But I don't understand how. How do you give away something someone gave you. Who do you give it to. Do you throw away perfectly usable stuff? Salvation Army no longer accepts toys because of all the recalls. I could freecycle it, I guess. But how do you decide what stays and what goes?

How do you keep toys organized? Every toy has about 200 pieces (an exaggeration). There are hundreds of toys, and pieces (not an exaggeration). Barbies go with barbie stuff, cars go with car stuff. What do jacks go with? How do you sort baseball stuff and etch-a-sketch?

As you can see, I am really struggling today. I just want a house I am not embarrassed by. I want to be able to display things I enjoy, put pictures on the walls, get rid of what I don't want, and not feel guilty about it. Well, back to trying to get the kids to clean their rooms!

God Bless
One Christian Mom

Homeschooling So Far

2010-09-14T16:40:00.003-04:00

So far, our homeschooling is going pretty well. The only problem is, about once a day, usually during the 2nd subject, and no matter which order I put the subjects in, my daughter has to stand in the corner to get her attitude straight. She decides she doesn't need school, doesn't want school, won't do school, whatever the case may be that day. Today, I told her if she was going to scream about not wanting to do school, she could go stand in the corner. She said no, so I put her there. She sat. I stood her. She screamed. I asked her to stop and she quited to fake sobbing noises. It lasted less than 5 minutes, and she came to me, apologized, and went back to the table. She asked for help with her lessons, which I did happily. Then the rest of the day went without problems. This happens almost every day, like she wants to see if she is going to get a "day off" once I start for the day. I am much stronger in my resolve than I was last year, so she is testing me for good reason, however she is also at a level now where if we are not consistent in doing lessons every day (or almost every day) her lessons will suffer for it.

We have made the complete switch to workboxes, which helps immensely. The kids can see what is next, finish some lessons on their own, and move at their own pace. I can put fun, motivational stuff in there for them to "break up" the "hard work". And when it's all done, clean-up has already happened.

The way I see it, by January, my daughter will be at 2nd grade level in reading and math, which was my goal. An unforeseen positive of this is that my son is also doing school every day, because he finds the workboxes a blast. I tried to put mostly "fun" learning-type stuff in them, and he would not have it. He wanted "real school" in his, same as his sister. So he is about 1/4 of the way through "teach your child to read in 100 easy lessons." He is also most of the way through Math-U-See Primer. He is already through the letter d in his handwriting (I will only allow him to do half a page a day, he's just going too fast :) ) and I am not sure what I am going to do with him when he is done with all that. He's not quite ready for Alpha in math-u-see, although maybe he will be by the time he is done with primer.

As far as other lessons, the "copywork for young ladies" did not work for us. It was meant for a child who can already write, and my daughter has such difficulties with that. We are thinking of ordering Writing With Ease. I am also trying to incorporate some math games so my daughter will memorize her math facts. She is good about addition, but does not have it memorized. Science is going well, as is history. They are LOVING the Apologia Astronomy and the History of the World. I just ordered a spelling program, and we like the Art program I chose. Still lacking are Health and Music. I don't understand why a child at these ages needs to be taught personal hygiene and parts of the body. Isn't that preschool stuff? My 3 year old son knows that stuff.

Music is a whole 'nother matter. I don't remember music class when I was in primary school, so I don't remember what was taught. I expose them to plenty of different types of music, instrumental and popular (christian popular). They like classical but not jazz (me, too :) ) They like "Jesus songs" and will sometimes create their own. i am still at a loss as to whether or not that is enough.

In the meantime, we are having a PJ day, AND are outside :) It was too nice a day to sit indoors all day, but I had already declared a PJ day and they will not relent! LOL So here we are in the yard in the pj's. (all are decent). I, myself am in sweats, but I sleep in sweats sometimes, so it kept the feel of PJ day.

I think that's enough rambling for now. How are your days going so far?

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

An "Off" Schedule

2010-09-11T17:13:00.002-04:00

Anyone else have an "off" schedule. By this, I just mean not the norm. I know most of my readers are homeschoolers, and by that are already "off" the norm :) However even within the homeschooling community, there is a normal. We fit into it sometimes and not others.

For example, we did school today. It's Saturday, but my husband works every 3rd Saturday and is off every 4th Monday, so we do school one Saturday a month, and take off one Monday a month :) We also school in the mornings sometimes and in the afternoons sometimes. I need a day-planner just to remember it all! Mostly we re-arrange our home schedule to meet the schedule of doctor's appointments and occasionally church functions.

We have "MOPS" (mothers of preschoolers) every other Tuesday at 9am. I know, 9am is not in my realm of understanding, but somehow I make it there, and we school in the afternoons on those Tuesdays. Also, if there is something fun awaiting us from the night before, sometimes we will finish it in the morning, and do the schooling in the afternoon. My goal is to be done before 2pm most days, but sometimes, we start at 2!

I guess my point is this... our "off" schedule works for us, no matter what others may think. I have people asking me to streamline our schedule so they will know when to call me. My answer is "if the phone is on, I will answer. If it is off, I will call you back." Others are telling me that my kids will never know structure if we continue on this way. No, they may learn it in later years, but for now they are having fun like a kid should (in my opinion.)

My mom is nervous because she is looking to move here mid-November or so, and isn't sure how she will fit into the schedule. I said, "You can go to sleep when you want, wake when you want, eat when you want (or with us), so long as you don't disturb school when we are doing it." She was so relieved, she said, "Or maybe I will even be part of school." Wow! How awesome.

Anyway, please tell me about your schedule, and how it works for you :)

God Bless.
One Christian Mom

I am so blessed!

2010-09-08T21:58:00.002-04:00

I started this post on wednesday. I am finishing it today (friday). Just so it makes sense! :)

I went to church today. I have no van, no public transportation, and yet I was able to go to church. Myself and my three kids who all use car seats! What a blessing. One of my friends could drive us to church an hour early, but couldn't drive us home. Another friend could drive us home, but not there. Problem solved! I brought our dinner with us, and we had a picnic under the awning in the back (they have picnic tables there). Then we played on the playground until it was time to go in. They had a blast. Then, when it was time to go, we switched over the car seats, and my other friend dropped us off at home, even helping to get the seats inside the house. How wonderful.

So now it is friday, and I find out my husband is not coming home this weekend, which poses a problem because we have a doctor's appointment on monday, and he has our van. So I put another notice out there that we need a drive to a dr's appointment that is 1.5 hours away and an hour long (so a total of 4 hours) and 3 people piped in that they could do it! I am overwhelmed (not surprised, but overwhelmed) at the idea that so many people are willing to help us. Definitely feeling blessed!

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Yet something else

2010-09-04T13:28:00.003-04:00

I try not to be like "Why me?" all the time, but lately it takes some effort. On the way home last night, my husband's brake line blew. He was able to safely pull to the side of the road and use the emergency brake to stop the car, and was also able to find a ride home. Thank the Lord for the big things, right???

So now we are faced with the seemingly gargantuan task of either fixing it, or going down to one car. We really just don't have the money to spend on another car. A new one is way out of our range, even with all the "no money down and cheap payments forever" deals going on. And another "beater" car will come with the same repair costs as the truck does, which is like another car payment!

Only having one car between the two of us will be difficult with him working in another state and only coming home on weekends. It means I will be "stranded" during the week. Thank goodness for stockpiling. There is little I need on a regular basis, and what I do need (like milk) can be stocked up on the weekends. A friend has offered to drive us to church on Wednesdays, so I will only miss the tuesday and friday meetings. As my mom said, "How many days do you really need to go to church, anyway?" :) Library can be done on weekends - maybe even daddy would enjoy taking them and giving me a few moments of reprieve.

Unfortunately, these things are expensive - and every little repair cuts into the money I had saved for Christmas, coal, and association dues. As hard as it is, I have decided to go back to a bare bones way of living. Some would already consider us bare bones, but lately I have afforded us little luxuries such as a lunch at mcd's or a new sticker book as motivation to do school, and overpriced art supplies.

So now it's back to no spending. We can do it. We have before. I just wish we didn't have to. Hey - at least when my kids get older, they will appreciate the value of a dollar. I see some of these "celebrity kids" in designer clothing with hundred dollar haircuts and several hundred dollar shoes and see a child who will never know that they are wearing our car! LOL

Hopefully that is the last of the complaints. I am thankful for safety, for the car we do have, for money management skills, and for wonderful family and friends!

God Bless.
One Christian Mom

Home Again

2010-09-03T15:58:00.002-04:00

Well, aside from being put through the proverbial wringer, miss princess is doing fine. The boys have been less than perfect since they have been home, but I chalk that up to being away from me for over a week. My "good boy" has been trying to get away with a lot, including upsetting his siblings. I have to say that the baby (who I have to stop calling a baby at almost 3!) is about the same as when I last saw him - totally 2! :) Miss princess is behaving much better, if still not eating well. Food is still an issue, however she is sitting down 3 times a day and at least putting some food in her mouth.

All tests came back negative, but we have follow up appointments with psychiatry and behavioral services. I need to implement some new "food rules" for the house that the boys may not like, but it wouldn't be fair to do for one and not all. Here they are:

1. No distractions at the table, other than ones Mom brings to the table.
I have been told that I should read to the kids at the table, stopping when they stop eating, and have a bite a page minimum. I am eliminating the minimum for 2 reasons. One is that it makes the boys eat more slowly, stretching it out. Two, because I end up putting the book down in-between bites to allow her to finish, and it stretches out mealtimes.
2. Mealtime is 45 minutes from the point the food goes on the table until the timer goes off.
3. After each child finishes eating, they may leave the table for some "screen" time until the 45 minutes is up.
The idea behind this is to encourage them to finish so they can use the computer or watch tv for a little while.
4. You must eat one bite of everything each "round". My kids (as with any kids) have a tendency to eat all of what they like first. In my daughter's case, it's the veggies or fruit, leaving the bulky stuff for "I'm full". So they all have to go around their plate taking one bite of everything before they can have a second bite of anything and so on.

That's it in it's simplicity. Implementing it is much harder. For one, I cannot effectively eat while doing this. If I eat before, I feel sick with all the "take a bite" and "chew" and "no, you cannot possibly be full yet, and you cannot get up off the table". If I wait until after, I am hungry (and sometimes it shows in my attitude.) I need to remember to have a small snack before, and eat the rest of the meal after, leaving cleanup to an argument because they are all off and playing while I eat my food. Anyway, I will make it work.

Also, I don't remember if I mentioned they re-instated overnight feeds, and the supplies were delivered yesterday. She had her first last night, and it went well. Please pray they continue to go well, as we are assuming that will be the bulk of her weight gain for now.

Other things are suffering. Laundry has piled up, the fridge needs to be cleaned out, and how does the bathroom get dirty over a week of non-use? Anyway, all stuff to be done over the long weekend - my husband will be home. Oh, and both cars need to be inspected. That's all for now. Hopefully I will be able to "catch up" with you all soon!

God Bless.
One Christian Mom

the Home Stretch

2010-08-30T11:21:00.002-04:00

Well, it looks as if we are going home tomorrow. The new doctor, determined that our situation is behavioral, put most of it on me, and said we were to be sent home tomorrow. No matter that we had an MRI this morning, of which the results are not yet back. No matter that she is currently undergoing ANOTHER clean out so that she can have an enema study tomorrow. No matter that no one yet has let me see the feeding sessions so I know what to do once we get home (and there will not be another feeding session because of the impending testing - poor kid hasn't eaten since last night). I know this is all common cause in a hospital, but I desperately need someone to cry to, and cannot make a call out. I have been asked not to leave her room because they can't get to her quick enough when she needs to go to the bathroom. So she (and subsequently, I) cannot eat, cannot leave, cannot talk to anyone unless they call, and I wish we could just end this now and go home without the further testing. But that is not the case. I will not let my daughter see my emotion, which is probably unbranded anyway. Being in a hospital will do that to you, make things seem like more than they are. Lack of sleep, lack of food, lack of fellowship - they all play a part in emotionality.

I pray that my next post comes to you with us all safely back home, for a long and hopefully normal Labor Day weekend.

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

We're Still Here

2010-08-27T20:54:00.002-04:00

Well, here I am from inside the hospital room :) My wonderful father in law, who is watching the boys this week, loaned me his laptop. It only took me 4 days to figure out how to use it on the hospital network. (yes, it's allowed, I asked :) )

I pray he will be able to keep the boys next week as well. I do have church family who could watch them next week, however they would be bounced around, and I feel better knowing my husband is with them every night, you know?

So far she has had an endoscopy and a colonoscopy. She has seen a psychologist, an endocrinologist (who ordered blood work), a feeding team (she has no actual eating issues) and a pediatric nutritionist who was able to get her to eat more than I have once, but not again.

For now, we sit awaiting orders for night feeds. I pray she does not have a bad reaction to them, as she did last time, and that this is our short term answer. I know we aren't going home soon, but wish we were, and the closer we come to her gaining any actual weight, the sooner we can go. :)

God bless!
One Christian Mom

PS - I am sorry I am being so bad at keeping up with your blogs, but as soon as this is over, hopefully I will have a chance to "catch up" with you all :)

Waiting

2010-08-24T11:54:00.003-04:00

I don't play the waiting game too well. That is exactly what I am doing today. The hospital hasn't called yet. I just got a call from the Doctor wondering where we were. I informed him that the hospital is waiting for a bed, and we were told not to arrive until they called. He said he was sure it will be later this afternoon, but I am going crazy waiting.

Oh, and playing facebook games is NOT a good way to waste time! I am going to go call a friend and see if she wants to get the kids together for lunch - maybe once lunch is done the hospital will have called and we can go.

Please pray for peace :)
God Bless.
One Christian Mom

Spiritual Sunday

2010-08-22T16:26:00.003-04:00

I did not attend service today. We woke up late and I was teaching toddlers in second service today. God taught me a lesson anyway :) He gave me words to speak to someone else, that also spoke to me. Remember a few weeks ago when I was struggling with homeschooling (again) and a close friend stated maybe I shouldn't? And someone gave me the verse about Teaching them in the way they should go?

The "helper" in my room today was a mature Christian, a woman I look up to. She has offered to help in the children's rooms, and she is a blessing. Her daughter is 19, and has strayed a bit from the Lord. She is angry at some circumstances in her life, and is blaming God for them. I was able to show her that God's word does not return void, and that she taught her children about Christ, and they accepted Him - thus teaching them in the way they should go. If she did what the bible says, and His word won't return void, then we just need to pray, because her name is already in the Book of Life. It gave me all the resolve I need to not even think about sending my daughter back to public school.

Here's why. I talked to a "middle schooler" today as well. She is a youth volunteer whom I always say acts more mature than most of the high schoolers I know. She is so poised and polite. She is a hard worker, service driven. She is quiet, but smart. She HATES school. I asked her why today. She said that school is all about drama, and the only reason she goes is because her mom has to work (she really does, she's a single mom). Her mom homeschooled them as long as she could, and still works with them after school. She says most of the time in school is either waiting for the other kids to "catch up" or taking attendance, getting everyone quiet, moving to the next subject, etc.

With both of the people I talked to today, I think God was trying to tell me something, don't you?

Anyway, my daughter goes into the hospital on Tuesday, and she will be there for around 10 days or so. They even said I could send some work and they would have a teacher that works at the hospital spend some time with her on it. :) Do you think they will like my Math-U-See and First Language Lessons? I wonder how many homeschoolers come through the hospital - maybe they are used to it.

Please have us in prayer this next week. I am apprehensive at best, trying not to worry about leaving my baby at the hospital. I know she will be in good hands, but I still worry sometimes.

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Computer Time

2010-08-14T23:06:00.001-04:00

Well, it's that time for me again. Time to admit I have been spending too much time on the computer and scale it back. That's why you haven't seen a post from me in a few days, and you may not again for a few more. I am going to try and be conscious of when I turn it on, and for how long I am online. It is just sucking away too much of my time right now that is better served on my kids and my home :) Praying you will understand and check back for updates once a week or so!
God Bless.
One Christian Mom

Another Doctors Visit

2010-08-09T20:29:00.003-04:00

Well, today we visited another doctor. He is a pediatric gastrointestinal specialist. His best suggestion for us is a 10 day intensive stay in the hospital for testing and observation. It's set for the end of August. In that time my daughter will have an endoscopy, colonoscopy, MRI, be seen by an Endocrinologist, Geneticist, behavioral specialist and feeding team. During that time, I am to be present for testing, and short visits only. He explained it to me a bit differently than the last suggestion for hospitalization. He said we don't want to see what we already know doesn't work. We want to see if the specialists can get her to gain weight (along with testing her and making sure there isn't other things wrong), and if they can, then they can teach me the techniques. My skills as a parent were in no way questioned, and I was not threatened by anyone saying I would not get my child back. I feel comfortable with this recommendation, and we are moving forward with it.
Now for the insurmountable task of preparing for it - financially, with the insurance, emotionally, care for the boys while I am in the hospital with my daughter, and of course, prayerfully. Would you please keep my family in prayer? Thank you!
God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Difficult Days

2010-08-07T19:05:00.003-04:00

We have had a couple of very difficult days around here. As I sit typing, I am surrounded by chaos. The laundry unfolded, toys everywhere, dishes undone. It's as if last week (you know, the one where I was keeping up) never happened. I am taking a moment of reprieve before I dive in to what is before me.

Let me rewind. A few days ago my daughter started complaining her stomach hurt. Well, let me rewind further. My daughter started getting stomach aches whenever she ate or drank. The doctor assured me that this is something normal (unfortunately) with patients who have had fundoplications, and it should work it's way out in time. So then she was complaining at night of stomachaches, and I was concerned, but not yet worried. Then, yesterday morning, she woke with her arms wrapped around her stomach complaining.

It was then I made a doctor's appointment for same-day. We went in to see the doctor, and explained the progression of things. She suggested I get my daughter to the children's hospital as soon as I could make arrangements to do so, also suggesting I leave the boys in someones capable hands. So I did as she suggested and off we went.

We arrived at the emergency room around 7 pm. No, nothing around here is close. The doctors office, my friend who watched the kids, the hospital - all are between half an hour and an hour and a half away, the hospital being the farthest. We admitted quickly, the doctor had phoned to let them know of our arrival and we were pre-registered. We went through triage with little effort and were waiting in luxury for a doctor to see us.

The doctor made light work of examining my daughter. Once he heard she had a tube, he dismissed the stomach ache. He did a blood count to make sure there was no infection, and sent us home with orders to call our gastro and get an appointment within the next 2 days. HELLO, it's a weekend, which is why the pediatrician suggested the ER in the first place?! I was more than a little upset leaving, which I did explain to the discharge nurse, and that was also recorded. We left, picked up the boys, and arrived home just past midnight.

Today, my daughter woke up without a stomach ache. I praise God for that, as myself and many others were praying through the night. The pediatrician had originally suggested a blockage, and being they did no testing I was concerned and prayerful through the night. She seems fine today, but I still called the gastro's office to schedule an appointment.

At first, the receptionist told me I could not have an appointment until late Sept or early Oct. I hung up with her and cried. I called Children's Hospital, but we have new insurance, and they don't take it, and they are already at their quota of Gratis cases this year. Hard times, for sure!

So I prayed. At this point, everyone is cranky. The boys woke up at dawn, as usual. Their clocks are just set that way. My daughter woke up much later, but was still cranky for having to have been in the hospital. I was upset for no one doing anything about my daughter's condition.

Then, what I consider a miracle happened. The pede's gastro doctor called. He said he had re-arranged his schedule for Monday, and put my daughter on it. YES! So we will make the trek out there on Monday (again, and hour and a half trip.) Then, a good friend called, and she offered for herself and her daughter to come with us for the trip. Awesome!

Now to clean up the mess of emotional distress. It's not pretty. I know I can do it, but I sure don't want to! :) I do want to, because I want to make this place look livable again.

Tomorrow's my birthday, and I don't want to wake up to this mess, so off I go to clean! God bless.
One Christian Mom

"Dog Days"

2010-08-05T19:22:00.002-04:00

Does anyone know why they are called the "dog days" of summer? I don't know, but I do know we are in them. We have been planning mostly indoor activities this week, our humidity is off the charts and the heat is pretty close. I just don't know how people survived in full dresses, long pants and shirts in the middle of the summer harvesting in the fields just to come inside and have it hotter that it was outside!

We have some air conditioning here, in the bedrooms. In the big main room (encompassing the kitchen, dining area and living room) we have a portable unit because there is no window to put a traditional air conditioner. Depending on the day, it may cool the area 10 degrees lower, or it may just keep our inside temp the same as outside.

So today it was the library. The kids were thrilled because it was story time. The children's librarian at our library is really great with the kids, and the program is fun. After that, they chose books (and I chose a few for them) and played the games they can only get at the library. Then it was home again for lunch. The kids played mostly in their rooms this afternoon with the air conditioning on.

Then I had to cook. Ugh. My sister bought me an electric grill a few years ago for Christmas, and boy does that thing get a work-out in the summertime! I "grilled" chicken on it, put on a pot of rice, and with a side of carrots, dinner was done. I ate, and the kids decided it was too hot to eat. Well, I don't usually allow food in the bedrooms, however today I set up snack trays for them, and we all sat on the big bed in the air and ate while we watched a movie (Pistachio by Veggietales). The movie is super-funny, although the kids don't really get the message through all the silliness. Still, it is good, clean fun. Again, we don't usually watch movies at dinner but tonight was an exception.

Still to go are baths, then I will try to read to them. I have a hard time reading to them at night because (being the wife of an electrician) the only good lighting we have is in the kitchen, and it seems too much like school to read at bedtime in the kitchen! I am going to see how it goes with a flashlight, maybe letting each take a turn holding it. Then it will be bedtime.

Just a note - the house is pretty picked up today. It's been three days now, and I have been able to keep order. It's not picture-perfect, but it's way better than it had been. Besides, a good friend tells me that a perfect house is the sign of a troubled mind. Don't know if it's true, but if it is, I should have NO troubles :)

Praying you are all well this evening. God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Working on it...

2010-08-03T19:45:00.003-04:00

So so far today, I am having a good day. I still have a bit to get done, and I am challenging myself to do it. :) I have to put school for tomorrow in the workboxes, and I need to shower. The kitchen counter and table could use a wipe-down. Other than that, my house is clean (messy, but clean. Does that make sense)?

This morning, when I woke up, the griddle and bread were out ready for me to make french toast, and the coffee pot was ready for me to turn on. I work much better with coffee :) Oh, as per the book I am reading "Deceptively Delicious," I added a bit of applesauce to the french toast batter to up the nutrition factor, and no one was the wiser. So then, we ate, and I cleaned up the mess! Can you believe it?

Anyway, I made the kids get dressed, and I dressed. That's a new one for us - we usually wear our jammies for half the day around here! Then, we sat down to our new workboxes. I bought shelves (I couldn't find shoe-racks and didn't want 12 boxes per child anyway). So they sat down, and without much fanfare, we started bible. I think the defining moment was realizing that because we cleaned up after breakfast and got dressed, it was like we "began our day". I really think that helped.

So my daughter really doesn't like learning. She procrastinates, she dilly-dally's, she draws pictures. And I am NOT stressing. She sees the boxes, and knows how many she has to do. She is her own person and can take as much or as little time as she wants to do each box. When she needs my help, I stop what I am doing and go help her. My son went through his boxes fairly quickly (doing all the work well) and was rewarded at the end with a video game. My daughter wanted a video game, too and I told her when she was done she could have a video game. I thought that would motivate her, but it didn't.

After my son was done, we had lunch. Lunch was grilled cheese sandwiches (with carrot puree spread on the insides of the bread.) The only comment I received was, "Mom, my sandwich is sweet. Thank you!" LOL If he only knew. We ate lunch, and my daughter got back to work.

As for my son, I need to think of productive things for him to do once he is done with his work. I asked him to build a lego tower, and he said no. I asked him if he wanted to draw, and he said no. He wanted to watch TV and wait. Well, that just wasn't an option. He and his brother ended up keeping each other busy in their room.

Finally, my daughter was done. I quizzed her on her science, which she remembered none of (and she had just read it 5 minutes earlier). I am going to have to make a game out of it or something.

Then I had a choice to make. Do I make the kids clean the living room (toys and such) or do I just say forget it and go to the park? In a very uncharacteristic move, I decided to take the kids to the park. I figured we can clean the living room tomorrow when it is raining, and have some fun today. :) I know not everyone will agree, but sometimes you just need to let it all go.

My daughter decided she didn't want to leave the park and I ended up having to carry her to the car and strap her in. She did eventually calm down, and by the time we got home (maybe 10 minutes) she was sorry, and decided she would stay with the family at dinner (rather than eating alone in her room).

So far, since dinner, we have played games, taken baths and are ready for bed. Not too bad for the course of a day.

Other things I would like to do but don't think I will have time for today is finishing our number strips and adding numbers, and cleaning up the kitchen island (again.) Oh, and my coupons are sorely in need of being organized. Other than that, I am caught up. I did laundry, cleaned, cooked and everything just in the course of the day :)

Lets just pray I can keep this up! :)

God Bless.
One Christian Mom

Reverse Perfectionism

2010-08-02T17:01:00.002-04:00

I have a hard time doing things I am not sure I will be able to complete, or to complete well. I have heard this termed "reverse perfectionism". Rather than try, I would rather not, and just deal with not having done it. I think it's a defense mechanism from growing up with a mother with OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder). She would not accept anything less than perfection on anything. Schoolwork, cleaning, finishing our meals, everything had to be done "right." And there was a "right" and a "wrong" way to do everything. There is only ONE way to clean the bathroom.

As I became an adult, and had an apartment of my own, I was able to keep up with this, for the most part. Everything was always in it's place to the point of exhaustion. I got A's in all my college courses (not that this is a bad thing, mind you). However, I did switch courses several times after receiving the syllabus and realizing I may not get an A. There were a few courses I wanted to take, but just knew I might not get an A, so I didn't take them.

Then I got married. You cannot be OCD for another person unless they allow it, and believe me, he didn't allow it. I fell the other way. If I couldn't clean to my standards, I just wouldn't clean at all. I kept up with the basics. Laundry once every few weeks. Dishes once a week. You get the idea. BARE minimum. Then I realized that was adding stress, and I started doing the bare minimum when it needed to get done. That was livable, at least.

Finally, we had kids. As you probably well know, kids are not born OCD. They are not perfectionistic by nature. They do things weather or not they will fail. They are usually happy with the results no matter what they are. And they don't know what clean is unless you tell them.

Fast forward to today. I still have a habit to not do something unless I think I can succeed. BORING! LOL My kids make a mess, and it stays there. I cannot make it perfect. Once a week, I make everyone put all their stuff away. Still not perfect. I don't organize things I don't think will look good when I am done, and I don't write meal plans if I don't think everything will be eaten.

I have decided, just this past week, to TRY. I got a few cookbooks from the library, along with a few organizational books (written by moms for moms). I can't wait to try. I don't have the money to do things the way I want them, but I am going to try anyway. It has to be better than where I am now, disorganized and arrayed. I am currently writing up a meal plan for the rest of the week that will hopefully help my days go by easier.

I am also writing up a plan of things to do each morning and evening. Whenever I attempted a schedule in the past, it was always either down to the minute (or 15 minute increments throughout the day) or a basis of "every Monday I do all the wash, Tuesday I do all the dusting" and so forth. So now I am going to try it a bit differently. It may look something like this:

Morning: get dressed, empty dishwasher, cook breakfast, eat, clean up dishes, start school (or outside activity)
Afternoon: Chores, get next day's school together - play with kids :)
Evening: After eating, clean kitchen, load dishwasher, bathe kids, put kids to bed, shower, run dishwasher, alone time, bed.

This is a much more loose interpretation of what I normally do, and I pray it works. The only problem is, if I do everything I am supposed to every day, I find it hard to find time for myself. Time to go on the computer, time to do my crochet or sewing or needlepoint. We'll see. Maybe after the house is running more smoothly I will find things that work better for us and I will get some time.

How do you guys do it?

God Bless.
One Christian Mom

I need to tomato stake...

2010-08-01T16:22:00.003-04:00

As I am typing this, I am printing out "Raising Godly Tomatoes." I am printing because I just can't read that much type on the computer. My mind starts skimming, and before I know it, I have clicked something more eye-catching and forgot what I was doing in the first place. Frustrating, but I know how my mind works, so I can get around it by printing.

I really need to read this in it's entirety. The first time, because it's online, I just skipped to the parts that were most relevant to me, and I think I missed a good portion of it. This time, I am going to three ring punch it, and put it into a binder I was able to pick up at the Salvation Army cheaply. That way, I will have it as a reference whenever I am in need of remembering to do it!

Other than some trivial things, I am so super excited to start this program for real this time. Here are some questions for any of you who "Tomato Stake."

1. How do you do simple things like going to the bathroom, showering, etc. when you aren't supposed to let your kids out of your sight?
2. And on another note, I have three kids, 1 girl and 2 boys. My daughter is more than old enough to need a separate bath, so how do I watch her and the boys when one is in the bath and the others aren't?
3. My church doesn't allow children (or more correctly, disruptive children) in the sanctuary, not to mention I am a children's church worker. Will this still work if I have the kids in children's classes at church?

Thank you to everyone who suggested I do this again, and also to anyone with answers for me!

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

In-Line

2010-07-31T13:26:00.002-04:00

OK, so in-line with my previous post (I know, two posts in one day? That's just unheard of for me :) here is my list of things to get accomplished today (or this weekend).

Today:
Stop feeling sorry for myself - first and foremost!!!
Grocery shopping
Clean the kitchen
Finish lesson plan for Sunday School

Sometime this weekend:
Finish figuring out workbox system
Make a schedule for the week (including school, extra-curriculars)
Go to the library

FIGURE OUT HOW TO SCHEDULE... LOL oh, and print out Raising Godly Tomatoes. I am sure I need to read that one again.

God bless!
One Christian Mom

Waiting In the Lord

2010-07-31T10:20:00.002-04:00

To tell you the truth, I have some growing to do. I find myself back at "square 2" this week. I say square 2 rather than 1 because at least now I know to go to the Lord (whether or not I do it). I find myself with some of the same feelings of inadequacy as I did two years ago when I first started this current journey. I had some harsh words said to me, and that coupled with my daughter's recent behavior really affected me in a way I couldn't have imagined. I don't know why I let it affect me this way, however it did, and I spent a good portion of the evening crying last night.

I hesitate to post more, because someone commented to me one day that in the future my kids may want to read what I wrote about them, and my words could be hurtful, painful and just downright wrong to have posted. Anonymous is one thing, but this blog is public, and I shouldn't say anything I wouldn't want them to read, right? Do unto others....

Anyway, I have some growing to do (again.) I need to reign in my tongue (and typing fingers), stop asking too many people for advice, start feeling confident in the jobs the Lord has given me, and start doing bible studies on biblical womanhood.

That's all for now, just an update.
God Bless!
One Christian Mom

PS - please know I am reading your blogs, I just am not commenting much right now. If you follow my blog, I more than likely follow yours as well. :)

There will be days like this.

2010-07-29T22:07:00.002-04:00

You all know the song, right? It never made sense to me as a kid. Days like this? What does that mean? NOW I get it.

We started off the day WAY to early (my son rises with the sun.) He started making some noise, as 4 year old boys will do, and I couldn't quiet him. He woke the 2 year old, who wakes easily. They, in turn woke the 7 year old, who said, "Mom, can you shut them up, I am trying to SLEEP!"

I was a little fumed about that remark, but it was too early for lectures and I hadn't yet had my coffee. Well, it was an hour before I did get any coffee. First the barrage of "I want a drink" and "mom, what's for breakfast" and finally "I have to go potty now".

Once that was all taken care of, I got to the coffee pot, put in coffee and water, and forgot to turn it on. I got to cooking breakfast, and it was decided that no one wanted what I was making. I was not happy about that, and went on cooking. It was pancakes, they all like pancakes, they will all eat pancakes. Well, the boys did, my daughter refused.

So I finally remember to turn on the coffee pot when the phone rings. It's a doctor's office and I have to answer. So I go outside (the only way to hear at this point.) I am talking and not realizing the kids are changing into their bathing suits. They got a bottle of water and before I noticed what was happening, they poured it down the slide and were sliding like I explained in a previous post. Problem is, today was supposed to be a school day.

So I get finished with my phone call, and yell (I mean YELL) to all get inside and get changed and I want teeth brushed and hair combed NOW. I mean NOW!!!

Well, that is not conducive to a calm house, and an upset house is definitely not conducive to learning. Believe me, I know. So... they sit, reluctantly at the table. Mind you, at this point I have had neither coffee nor breakfast. I assign the first lesson, which is promptly refused. So I give a choice. This or that. She chooses that (mainly because I offered this first. Not because she likes that more). So I get to putting coffee in a cup and preparing my breakfast. I sit down to coffee and pancakes just as my daughter declares she is done, gets up from the table and walks away. By now I am feeling sick to my stomach and need to go to the restroom.

I have determined (with the help of a friend) that my thyroid is again acting up. I am showing all the symptoms, and need to save some money to get my labwork done. So I get back to my daughter, and she explains to me that she is done with school today, she doesn't want to do any more.

I explain to her that she has to finish. And on and on it goes. We break for lunch, and on and on it goes. Around 3 pm she finally finishes (by the way, my 4 yo son did his work well and without complaint, and I still havent figured out what to do with the 2 year old yet, so he plays.) Usually the 2 year old plays nicely, but when my daughter acts like this, he needs a lot of attention.

Today he decided on negative attention. "Bad mommy" and "I don't like you" were favorites of the day. Along with kicking, hitting, screaming. It was like an episode of Supernanny around here today.

Dinner is another story entirely, and in brief, I was the only one who ate, and there was food on the floor. I was angry to say the least. They went to bed hungry, which I am not supposed to do per the doctor, but sometimes I have to draw the line.

Well, all are in bed now, so it wasn't too bad I guess. Here's hoping for a better tomorrow.

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Tired

2010-07-27T21:56:00.003-04:00

Boy, am I tired. We went to my in-laws for the weekend, and it was pretty packed with excitement. :) I was a little under the weather, so this was a stretch for me, but it was fun anyway.

It all started with a non-compliant 2 year old. Did I need to clarify, or is the fact that he's 2 enough? As I was packing the bag, he was purposely unpacking it. Then he was re-packing with all his favorite things. I would go into a room to get something we needed just to come out to a great big mess. So... I cleaned it up, repacked the bag, and took it with me through the house packing, as he was grabbing on it, trying to pull it off my arm.

Eventually we did get packed (with a little help from a 7 year old). Into the car and off we go, just to realise it's lunchtime. Well, we have to stop for gas in a little while, so just hold your hunger 'till we get there and I will pick up food. What is standing there next to the gas station, big and proud and unhealthy in all it's glory? Yup, you guessed it. A McDonald's. Of course we had to drive through, it would be sacrilege not to, right?

Equipped with a full tank and a bag full of what is sold as food, off we go. Uh, oh. Mom, I need to go to the bathroom... now! Well, maybe it was the entire cup of iced tea you drank. (Said in increasing volume). Daughter: "Maybe, but I still need to go, and you did buy it for me." Me *in exasperation* "Well, where would you like me to go. That patch of trees over there looks nice!"

Well, we took care of that problem, (no, not in the trees :) and we made it to "Nana and Poppy's" with out further interruption. When we got there, daddy was ready to take the crew to a pool party at the house of a friend of his. I was not up to going, and he gave me some respite by taking the kids anyway. On his own. All three. Can you believe it?

I spent some nice time with his parents talking about our plans for homeschool this year (they are pretty much in support at this point), the current economic crisis and other topics of dual interest. We had a nice dinner, and they went to bed. The kids and daddy were still not home yet. I called them, and he was on his way back with them. They came home and said I had missed the best party. Ever. Well, the kids said that. My husband, in tag-team style, said "your turn" as he continued to walk to the room he uses at his parent's house (remember he lives there during the week for work). I got the kids ready for bed, and in bed, but it was hours before all three were sleeping. Sometime after midnight, I think.

The next day was the fair. We had breakfast, showered, bathed, all ready. My husband's parents decided not to go because the heat index was just ridiculous. I would have bowed out as well had I not felt so badly about not going. So we took the kids. Here's the brief of it... food, rides, games, petting zoo, 4-H exhibit, living history show, classic cars, thunderstorm, home. :)

Dinner, movie, bed. still no sleep. Re-arrange the sleep arrangements. Still no sleep. After midnight again. Oh, and remember my son gets up at around 6am or so no matter what time he goes to bed.

Next day was a bit slower. We had nothing to do until the doctor's appointment at 4:30. We went for a walk outside, which was the highlight of the day. We mostly played inside and watched tv. Lots of tv watching there. Then the boys stayed with Poppy while I took my daughter to the doctor. Just a check-up. Then back to my inlaws for dinner.

Now for the gargantuan task of prepping everyone to go back home. There is no way I will be up until midnight again sitting in a bed hoping for sleep. We are leaving. I said now! LOL Like that ever works. So we get all packed up just in time for daddy to get home from work. His hours are crazy, sometimes he's home at 6 (rarely) and most times he's back at 8 or so. I didn't know when to expect him, but he walked in as we were ready to walk out. He wanted to spend some time with the kids, so we stayed for a bit.

WHAT? It's 8:00?? Ok, now we really have to go. Come on, you will see daddy in a few days, and if we stayed, it would be bedtime anyway. That's a good girl, get in the car. Ok, everyone, say goodnight to daddy.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzz, huh? Oh, I'm driving. Ok, shake it off. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Oh, right. Eyes on the road. What was I thinking leaving at 8pm? Gotta stop for some coffee. Ok, that's better. Ok, get on the speakerphone, talk to someone, that'll help.

Finally home! Carry each kid up the stairs, into bed, shoes off. Air on, covers up. Done. Unpack in the morning. Fall into bed. Look at clock... MIDNIGHT??? You're kidding me. Oh, well.

Good night! God Bless :)
One Christian Mom

A Word of Wisdom

2010-07-23T22:52:00.002-04:00

A friend of mine shared something with me today that is sure to stick with me for a very long time. She saw it on a church bulletin board and just had to share it with someone. I found it so wise, I would also like to share. Here it is:

Keep your words sweet today, you just may have to eat them tomorrow.

:)

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Lazy Summer Days

2010-07-19T20:33:00.004-04:00

Ok, well not really lazy, but fun! We started off the day with a late breakfast in our jammies. Then, after the breakfast dishes were done, we all wandered off to get dressed. My son came out with a book for me to read, so I did. Then we eventually got to our school work. We are on a modified schedule right now for two reasons. One - it keeps their mind fresh without all the struggles of a regular school year. And two - when the school year officially starts, we will already have about a month in, giving us leeway for doctors visits and any other medical (or non-medical) issues we may encounter.

So after we did a bit of school work, it was time for lunch. The kids decided they wanted a picnic, but it was raining, so we did a picnic in our living room :) I put down a tablecloth on the floor, and we ate our lunch pretending we were outside. Then we finished our school work, and decided to watch a movie. By that time it was no longer raining, but still humid.

About 10 minutes into the movie, we had a power outage. What to do, what to do? The kids noticed it wasn't raining, and asked if they could get into their bathing suits so we could go outside to play. Why not? So they got all suited up, and out we went.

The slide (one of the little tykes types, not a full size slide) had some water left on it, and my daughter declared it a water-slide and went right on down. Weeee, that was fun! Then my sons proceeded in like fashion. Then, it was dry. What now? My daughter brought over the hose and wet it down again. They continued this way for quite some time. Good, clean fun! :)

After a while, it started to rain again, and we came inside to dry off. I realized it was past dinnertime! We had sandwiches for dinner, and all is well in our world, as (obviously) power was restored halfway through dinner. I put the air on in the bedrooms, and the kids cooled off in there while playing and waiting for bedtime.

Which reminds me, I had better get them put to bed so we can do it all again tomorrow! Don't you just love summer??

God Bless.
One Christian Mom

A New Chapter

2010-07-17T13:48:00.005-04:00

Allow me to get a little sentimental here for a minute. My baby is growing up. What brings on this sentimentality? Well... we ditched his last sippy cup today.

And the only one who shed a tear was me!

I had told myself about 6 months ago that my son was ready for a "real cup" at the table, and a tumbler (the kind with a lid, not leakproof) in the living room. Yes, I allow food and drink in the living room. If you had kids with the food issues mine have, you might, too. I never thought I would, but... well I am veering off topic.

So he still had 2 very usable sippy cups left, and he wasn't ready to get rid of them yet. Rather than argue, I said that once those sippys weren't usable anymore, we would throw them out and not buy new ones. One was lost very soon after that - left somewhere or other never to be seen again. The other has lasted 6 months.

Now this wasn't just any sippy cup. This was my daughter's sippy cup. The 7 year old. Somehow, it lasted that long. (I highly recommend Gerber fun color cups - they last 6 years!) This cup was pink with an orange top, a sad mismatch of the cups we had left. The others either had ended up moldy (it happens with this humidity), uncleanable (after many years of use, this also happens!) or lost. This one had stood the test of time through three kids and many valve changes.

When I took it out of the dishwasher this morning for another day of faithful service, it had mold. I tried washing it again by hand, but the spots would not budge. So I explained to my son that it was no good and needed to be put in the trash. He grabbed the cup out of my hand, and pointed to the recycling. "This trash, mommy?" He smiled proudly as he said "Bye, bye sippy." And that was it.

So now, my last baby is drinking from a "real cup". Boy, time moves fast!

God Bless.
Shellie

I must be insane.

2010-07-15T17:14:00.003-04:00

Well, if you know me in real life, you already know I am insane :) Anyway, I started facilitating what is called a "step study" at my church. A step study is for people who participate in the group Celebrate Recovery. It's a step-by-step guide to recovery from life's hurts, habits and hang-ups. Basically, if there is anything you have trouble with, a step study will help you :) I am almost finished with mine, and they needed another female group. They have needed another female group for quite some time.

I felt lead to start one, and I told the program facilitator that I was looking to start one once I was done with the group I was in. He asked how many lessons I had left, and when I told him 4, he decided to get my group in the works. It was slated to start yesterday, a week after I finished my last lesson.

Problem is, we didn't finish our lessons! One week after the next, people kept cancelling. So we still have 3 lessons to go. That in itself is not an issue. I can still facilitate (which I did yesterday). The problem is the number of nights a week I will be out until this is done!

My new group meets on Wednesday nights from 7-8:15 or so. My kids are enthusiastic because the kids programs at my church on Wednesday nights are fantastic. They have been wanting to go back for quite some time.

Then, my almost finished group meets on Thursdays. We meet at 6:45, and being there are more of us, we usually don't get done until 8:30 or so. I love these ladies like family, and even though I will be glad to finish the group, I will miss meeting with them almost every week.

Finally, on Friday nights, we have Celebrate Recovery. This is the main group, where there is the worship, teaching, and group share for the week for everyone. I love this, it's like church only on Friday night with more fellowship. :) This meets from 6:30 for dinner to around 9:15 or so.

We used to have church on Saturday nights, thank goodness that is on break until fall. I couldn't handle 4 nights out a week! So for the next three weeks or so, we will be out 3 nights a week until my group concludes. Then I will get a break ;D

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

And It Begins Again

2010-07-12T19:44:00.004-04:00

It seems just yesterday we were getting ready for my mom to come here, stopping homeschool, cold weather (it stays cold here through may sometimes), and party planning. Now all is over and it's back to homeschooling. We "officially" begin tomorrow, but we did a few lessons today at the kids' request.

I decided we will school year round for two reasons. One, I won't have to waste time at the beginning of the school year reviewing and refreshing memories, and getting back into a routine. Two, if we have extensive doctors appointments (which is a reality around here) or a trip to the hospital, we won't have to worry about "keeping up" with school days. The district says we can start any time in July, but our portfolio must be submitted by June 30th, so there is more leeway on the start than on the stop.

I wrote my curriculum for the next two weeks today, as well as ordered any books I think we may need. We will get started without history and grammar books, as those programs will arrive sometime next week, however I have put something together to work on this week while we wait. I didn't want to wait to start until after they arrive.

Here's what we are using so far this year.
Pathway Readers More Days Go By for reading and comprehension
Apologia Science Exploring Creation with Astronomy and Notebooking Journal
The United States Workbook - This was actually found at Target, it's a cute workbook of the 50 states
Math U See Alpha
Growing Growing Strong Health curriculum. I am not happy with this, so it may change soon.

And here's what I have ordered.
Mastering Manuscript - It's a Zaner-Blozer (sp?) workbook to help her with her writing, she's still not writing well.
Story of the World - and the workbooks for both children
First Language Lessons for the Well Trained Mind - I can't wait to get this one :)
Art Adventures at Home - I am not an artist and feel I didn't do a good job last year. This is an inexpensive resource for peace-at-mind.
And Sequential Spelling.

For my son, he will be doing Teach your child to read in 100 easy lessons. He will also be continuing Math U See Primer. And of course, lots of arts and crafts

All three children will sit in on bible. I found a PDF curriculum, the name of it escapes me right now. I was excited to find it, as it encompasses all age ranges into one teacher's guide, making it simple for me.

Have you started ordering your homeschool books yet? Do you school year round? Leave me a note :)

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Blogger's Block

2010-07-11T21:25:00.002-04:00

I have heard writers say they have Writer's Block. Well, I have blogger's block. When I am in the car, or the shower, or eating dinner, I have a million thoughts on what to write on the blog. Always when I don't have a pen and paper available. Then, I sit down to write. Can I think of ONE thing I wanted to write about? Nope. :P

One thing I could tell you about was today's sermon. It was a pretty good one, about how we, as Christians, can handle difficult people. My pastor said it's one thing to be a Christian, and another to become a doormat. We need to have boundaries in place, and exercise them. One thing I don't understand is when two people each have boundaries that conflict, how do they compromise without one of them becoming the doormat in the relationship?

Another thing I could write about is this heat. It is supposed to break tonight, but being up here in the mountains, anything could happen. I just pray it doesn't stay quite so humid.

I could also tell you about my curriculum choices for this year, but I will save that for another post.

So it's true what they say... it may not be what you had planned on writing, but once you put pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard), words will flow :)

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

A Great Preparedness Resource

2010-07-10T22:03:00.004-04:00

If you have been reading this blog for any length of time, you will remember that I am a "prepper" or one who believes in being prepared. For what, you ask? Well, as much as possible! We started with keeping gallons of water in the house for when the power goes out (we have a well-pump, so when we loose power, which happens often, we loose water.) Then we got an alternate heat-source for wintertime. We also started storing food and health items. It kind of balloons from there, I am currently working on "bug out kits" which are basically a kit that contains items for about a three day period of displacement, so in case of fire, flood, etc.

Are you interested in prepping, but don't know where to start? Two of the members of one of my favorite forums http://www.americanpreppersnetwork.net/ wrote a book, called
It's A Disaster... and what are you gonna do about it?
Here are just a few of the topics the book covers:
What are YOU gonna do about...
an Earthquake?
an Evacuation?
a Family Emergency Plan?
a Flood?
Heat-related illnesses
a Hurricane?
Wildfires?

Go ahead to the site and take a look around, they even give you little snippets of info on the website.

If you have any questions about why or how I prep, feel free to comment and I will answer you to the best of my ability. In the meantime, why don't you join American Preppers Network, listed above? You can learn some hands-on "stuff" while you wait for your book :)

God Bless!
Shellie
PS - I was in no way compensated for this post. Thank you, and goodnight :D

Uncomfortable at the Mall

2010-07-09T22:23:00.002-04:00

Yesterday I dropped my mom off at the airport :( . From there, we went for a visit to my in-laws. :) My father-in-law didn't want to just sit in the apartment for two days, and it was WAY too hot to bring the kids out to play. My mother-in-law is battling cancer, and is very weak, so she can't do anything strenuous (and strenuous for her is basically anything interactive right now as she is trying to get better). So, my in-laws suggested a trip to the mall.

I haven't been to the mall in years. I don't remember why I stopped going, probably because I don't have the money to buy anything there! But I realized I haven't been to a mall since my second child was born.

I learned three things at the mall today.
1. Anything you can buy at the mall, you can buy elsewhere, and probably for cheaper.
2. There are images at the mall that promote things a young child should not be exposed to (well, to tell you the truth, they made me uncomfortable as well)
3. The mall can give almost anyone a case of stuff-itis.

We did have fun with my in-laws. The kids rode the carosel, we got ice cream, we walked around and looked at stuff. Each kid got a ride on Nana's lap in her wheelchair :)

But some things were not so fun, like explaining to my 4 year old son that he cannot look at the posters of the Victoria's Secret models. Or talking to my 7 year old daughter about the sign picturing 2 nude people on the beach being almost intimate with their clothes next to them. Or telling my 2 year old that he cannot have everything he sees!

We don't have tv. Well, we have an antenna, but it gets a few network channels we don't watch, and PBS which I let the kids watch here and there. We definitely don't get images like that put into our home. I don't bring magazines into the home with "questionable" material in them, I even stopped subscribing to some homemaking magazines because of this.

Next time we all want to do something fun indoors, the mall is OUT! I may be overreacting, but isn't the whole point of keeping them home being able to control what they see and hear? Now I know, maybe I did before, but it has been so long since I have been to a mall that I didn't think of it. Next time, I will.

God Bless!
OneChristianMom

Summertime Heat and more

2010-07-06T20:13:00.002-04:00

It seems I am not the only one truly keeping up with their blog this summer. Yes, I do still read all of your blogs, I just don't comment as much as I should (which is probably why I don't receive many comments lately). Anyway, the heat here is almost unbearable which is uncharacteristic for the mountains. It was 100 degrees today, and should be the same tomorrow. I can't wait for the break in the weather. We don't have much air conditioning - we don't usually need it. We have one unit for our "main room" which is almost 1400 square feet. And one in each bedroom, so we are cool at night at least.

On another note, my daughter had a blood test and urinalysis on Monday, and all came back "normal", so we are back to square one. To me, it just confirms that we are doing all we can. To the doctors, it's a mystery to be solved. We have another appointment at the end of the month, and the doctor will let us know what the next step is.

That's all for now. I am going to go eat some ice...

Keep cool, and God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Just Fun

2010-07-01T21:53:00.003-04:00

Today we did something with the kids that was supposed to be fun. We took them to the local "Pizza and play" joint. It was pretty fun for the kids, because they don't always understand everything that is going on around them. But for my mother and I, and also one other couple in the restaurant, it was not so fun. Which was disappointing because my mom is only here for another week.

So what happened to make the trip less than enjoyable? Well, first off, there were kids in the play area with no parents in site. Secondly, there were kids in there who were way too big to be in a playzone, if you ask me. And lastly, the kids in question were not well-behaved.

Do you let your kids enter a play area without you in-tow? Do you let your kids out of your sight? I have been told I am overprotective of my kids, and I need to let go a little by well-meaning friends. I think other parents need to step up and train their kids how to act, even in front of other kids.

Maybe I am wildly off-base here, but my opinion (and don't bash me for my opinion, please) is that parents need to 1) be able to see their kids in public situations and 2) need to be able to correct children's behavior if it gets out of hand. Yes, even on the playground I require my children to be polite and observant of others.

So we explained to my kids a few things. 1) It is not ok to misbehave even if others are. 2) It is also not ok to point out other's misbehavior unless they are hurting you or someone else. and 3) If you feel you are going to get hurt, stop and come back to mommy. So with these rules in place, my kids were still able to have some fun. The pizza was good! Conversation with my mom was good. The kids listened to the rules and followed them pretty well, I only had to reprimand them once for trying to follow a kid up a slide.

When the other kids started to get too rough to ignore, we had been there a while, and packed up our stuff and left. I have no want to reprimand parents over not watching their kids, and no need to get into it with another person's kid. So I told my kids, "Time to go." They did the requisite, "Awwww, mom." To which I said, "Now, please." For some reason, that did it, and they all got their shoes on (well, two of them got their shoes on, the baby brought me his shoes to put on him.) and that was that.

I just pray that as time wears on, people realize that not raising their children has a negative impact on them, and that they start teaching their children how to behave.

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Going Crazy...

2010-06-23T22:05:00.003-04:00

I am seriously going crazy! As you know, we just finished our first "official" homeschooling year. I say official because we homeschooled last year as well, but this year, due to circumstances I don't fully understand, we had to register with the school district (2 full years early.) So now I am trying to get our evaluation binder ready, and I am going insane.

Is this enough? Is it too much? Am I including the right stuff? Is she going to want to see this? These are just some of the questions I am driving myself crazy over.

Our evaluation is on Friday, and a good friend recommended the person who is doing the evaluation, so that sets me somewhat at ease. I almost want to crate up all our homeschool stuff and have it all in the car the day of the evaluation. :P

On another note, my mom is thoroughly exhausted. She doesn't remember life with kids being this busy. Actually, I don't remember it being this busy until we were older, but I am actively involved in the church, and also with other ministry, so it keeps us going. That's not to mention the stuff the kids want to do, like going to the library, and all the doctor's appointments.

So that's life for now. Hopefully this blog will pick up more now that the major medical stuff is out of the way until late July.

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Yet Another Doctor's Appointment

2010-06-22T21:49:00.002-04:00

Well, our new doctor's office is about 2.5 or 3 hours away depending on traffic, and we made that trip out today. Thank goodness my mom is here right now, it's our second trip there since she's been with us. I learned to change my daughter's tube today. I know it sounds silly, I should have known since the first time it was changed, but the other doctors office always made a big production out of it, like it was something only the doctors and nurse-practitioners could do. They made it seem like it had to be done sterile, and by a medical professional.

The opposite is true. A parent should know how to change the tube, and I was told that by this nurse practitioner. She said that it did need to be changed (and I thought so, which is why I made the appointment in the first place). She said, "There's nothing wrong with the surgery site, it's just the tube." To which I stated, "Ok, so what needs to be done." And she laughed. She said, "You need to replace it."

I said, "I need to replace it??!!" She then looked at me funny. I stated, "We didn't get the tube put in here. I was never shown how it works, let alone how to change it."

Then she gave me sympathy. We have had the tube (I say we like it's part of me, too!) for a year and a half. I have figured out how it works, what to do "when..." and other things. But changing it seemed just too much for me.

She retrieved a new tube kit from the supply area and handed it to me and said, "Today, you change a tube." Guess what! I did :D I changed my daughter's tube in the doctor's office. Now I know I can do it, and I won't have to make the 3 hour each way trip just to change a tube anymore. Also, I can rest easier knowing that if anything happened, I can do it myself.

So that's my story for today. Hope you had a good day, too.
God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Time is Flying!

2010-06-19T22:55:00.002-04:00

I apologize for the lack of posts the last few days - as some of you know, my mom is here visiting and time is just flying! I will be back up to a regular schedule sometime soon, she is here through to next month, so I don't know exactly when, but soon :)

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Cute Kids

2010-06-15T19:13:00.002-04:00

My son says "cute kid" things all the time, but this one was really cute :) We were rummaging around downstairs looking for a bike pump and came across a board game that is above their level that was gifted to us from a family who moved out of the area. Anyway, he asked, "What is that?" And I said, "It's a board game, but it's not our level yet, we're saving it for when we are ready."

Later in the day he comes to me and says, "Mommy, it's OK, we can try the boring game, I bet it's not that bad!"

Very cute :)

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

More Testing

2010-06-09T22:11:00.003-04:00

My daughter had to go to the doctors yesterday. She had a "sweat test" which tests for Cystic Fibrosis. Also, they ordered a Hemocult, and they want to have her see Pedes Gastro Surgery for a tube replacement. This poor kid has been put through the wringer so many times. And now her attitude is suffering for it again. She is showing the same attitude problems she was showing a year ago around this time. Please pray for her that she goes through this with a better understanding of what God's will is for her through this. I really think her walk with the Lord is close enough right now for her to accept this easier if He were to show her why. Does that make sense? Is that possible? I pray so...

On another note - she turns 7 tomorrow! Do you believe it? I have a seven year old daughter. It's mind boggling to me. We have her party all set up, but tomorrow guess where we are going. If you have been reading my blog for some time, you guessed it - We are taking the birthday shoes trip! And my mom is here to help :)

My kids LOVE birthday shoes. Admittedly, so do I! On their birthday every year, we go out and buy them a new pair of shoes. Because we only buy them shoes once or twice a year, this is a special treat, and they get to pick the shoes out themselves (within reason). Then, we will all go out for ice cream at the local "pizza and play" type-establishment. Fun will be had by all, I am sure.

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Another Visit from my Mom!

2010-06-02T18:39:00.002-04:00

My mom is coming! :) She gets in tomorrow and we could not be happier. We weren't sure if she was going to be able to fly, but she is feeling fine and got an all clear from her doctor. As long as her health holds out, she will be here for 5 weeks.

My headache is finally subsiding. It's still there, but it's in the background. I can think and function again, which is definitely a good thing. Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers.

Not much of an update for now, but you can check out what I have been up to by catching my new blog - Making Cents of Coupons. Hope you like it!

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Migraines

2010-05-24T23:27:00.004-04:00

I have been online a bit, but not posting much of anything. You see, I suffer from migraine headaches. Well, I used to. I haven't had a migraine since before my daughter was born. I have had headaches, and even remembrances of migraines (what I thought was one, but now I remember, it wasn't!) I remember because now I have a REAL one.

2 and a half weeks ago, I woke up dizzy. I then threw up. For those of you who have followed this blog for a while will probably guess, it's not possible for me to be pregnant right now. Later that morning, it hit like a ton of bricks. I had to sit because my head then weighed about a million pounds. That was the end of life as I knew it pre-migraine.

I thought I was absent-minded before??? As some of you unfortunately know, it's hard to put a coherent thought together when your head hurts, let alone plan the daily activities and homeschool for a whole family. Not to mention activities that can't be cancelled, and just everything.

I tried to rest the first few days thinking I could rest it off. Well, then I had a dirty kitchen, no clothes to wear, some re-scheduled appointments, homeschool to make up and a raging headache. No rest for the weary.

So I started to clean, wash, fold (well, not so much fold :) ) and just try to get back to daily life. What I didn't realize was at that point I stopped taking care of myself. I was drinking almost exclusively coffee to keep me going, I was eating whatever I could get my hands on easily, feeding the kids almost entirely from boxes and cans (I know, but I am trying to survive here). At least they were EATING! :) More on that another time, but yes, they are eating.

I went to a bible study group on friday night, and my friends said I didn't look good (HEY!). I knew what they meant, and explained the headache. I got some good advice, the best of which was drink non-caffenated beverages and eat some foods with calcium. I had to take a look at what I had been consuming and realized I had had no calcium and was probably dehydrated.

At this point, it's livable. The migraine is definitely still there, but it has reached a point where I can function without too much concentration. If I get up too fast or turn my head quickly, you will hear "Oh!" But other than that, it's clearing up.

Hopefully I will get back to a more regular schedule of posting again soon, however we do have a visit with my mom coming up, and some testing for my daughter. Thank you all for sticking with me through all of my life's ups and downs! Keep my head in your prayers, please :)

God Bless.
One Christian Mom

PS - I didn't write this post for sympathy (prayers gladly accepted, tho) but because I have realized in the past few weeks that most people really have no idea what a migraine sufferer goes through. I even had one woman say "oh, well we all get headaches and work through them!" as she declined to help me in the children's ministry. I did get help, though. I was the teacher and had the lesson planned, so I couldn't bow out, but also couldn't trust myself alone with 8-10 kids!

Real Life

2010-05-15T21:46:00.002-04:00

Well, it seems real life has taken over, and my blog is suffering for it! :) I found out I got an award over at http://therempels4.blogspot.com, she awarded me two awards, and I cannot figure out how to get them on here, but they were "The Versatile Blogger" and "One Lovely Blog" awards. One of them was posting 7 things about yourself - so here goes...
1. I have a hard time identifying myself apart from my kids - to the point when I am out without them, I get nervous, like I am forgetting something!
2. I was told I could never have children, and I have three natural children - and no doctors helped us!
3. I am addicted to couponing
4. I used to have an internet addiction - God has healed me of that
5. I attend Celebrate Recovery every friday night - it helps me learn to lean on Jesus more and my own understanding less.
6. I believe my relationship with Christ can get stronger, and I am working towards that.
7. I am standing in agreement with several ladies in my church for healed marriages, and healed children! For some reason, a bunch of us all have hurting marriages and sick kids - so coincidence ruled out = PRAYER!

Please play along. I am constantly on the run, and would love to award these awards to many of you lovely ladies, but time is not on my side.

And a quick update: My daughter went to Children's Hospital of Philly, and they determined that she may have Cystic Fibrosis. I am waiting for the insurance company to decide whether or not she can be tested for it, and then we will have to make the trip back. Please continue to keep us in prayer.

I am sorry I have not been posting to all of your blogs. Please know I am reading and staying updated with you when I can :)

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Our Home School

2010-05-04T17:00:00.002-04:00

Yesterday a fellow blogger posted what her homeschool is like, and invited others to do the same. You can head over here http://myblessedhome.blogspot.com/ to read hers, and here is mine:

What type of home school style do you generally fall under?There are so many different "styles." There is eclectic, Charlotte Mason, Unschooling, Classical (Trivium), etc.
We are very eclectic here. I tried a little Charlotte mason, with some homeschooling and a little Montessori method, then put in some classical and a bit of "real school". Mix it all together and you have us!

Are your children in the same grade level that their age dictates?
I don't really know. I haven't been inside a public school in a really long time, but my daughter reads and does math addition and subtraction, she can follow a map, she is interested in science and early American history. So I would say she is at a 1st grade level. I think :) My 4 yo son is learning to read, knows his numbers and can do very basic addition, both boys (the other is 2) know how to count to 20 and know all their colors. They all have a love for the Lord and that is the most important thing.

Which curriculum do you use?
I don't like curriculum packages. We have tried two, and neither one worked for us. I try to stick to what works for us! Math is Math-U-See. My kids were struggling with math before we started this. Learning Reading is "How to teach your child to read in 100 easy lessons" and they really are easy! Further reading is Pathway Readers. For history, we are reading Young Americans. They are really into this one! Science is anything they are currently interested in. They tell me what they want to learn, and I either pull a book off the shelf or we head on over to the library.

What does a home school day look like in your house?
It really depends on the day. Today we woke up, ate breakfast and got dressed, brushed teeth and hair. Then we sat down and did Bible reading. Then we did math worksheets. My oldest went on to take her reading "test" (a comprehension page but she LOVES tests, so that's what we call it :) ) while I worked with my middle on reading and the youngest did some coloring. Then it was science time, and the kids pulled a dinosaur book off the shelf for me to read. Then they all did an activity and we were done for the day. It was a shorter day because we had a doctor's appointment this afternoon.

How do you home school multiple children of different ages?
Basically the way you see above. For the "mom reads" parts we all sit together. When one child is ahead of another, we sit separately with worksheets or books and one works on their own while I help another.

What types of books do you assign your children to read, and what books do you read aloud as a family?
Anything my daughter can read on her own, I encourage her to do so. They are little yet, so I still do most of the reading. My daughter can read from her bible, but when I want them to get "real" scripture I read to them from mine. Lately they want me to read aloud to them from their science or history books, but sometimes it's Larryboy saves the day, or some other silly book!

What has been your over all experience in home schooling so far?
It definitely has it's ups and downs. I won't lie and say it's all pretty all the time, but when we have a day like today, when my kids were all on task and I could SEE them learning, it reminds me of why I do the hard days!

I hope you decide to give us a look into your homeschool life!
God Bless.
One Christian Mom

Couponing For Community (or in other words - donate!)

2010-05-03T20:53:00.002-04:00

As many of you probably know, this week is "Stamp Out Hunger" week - on May 8th you put a bag (or two or three) of non-perishable foods out by your mailbox and the post office delivers them to the local food bank. In conjunction with that, a fellow blogger "ChaChing on a ShoeString" has started a movement called "Couponing for Community" in which we all get as much as we can for as little money as we can (or for those of you with a disposable income, buy something! :) ) in the "HBA" department. So things like razors, deodorant, feminine products, shampoo, soap, etc. Food banks always get food. Some people are hurting for these other basic needs. So the idea is to donate them to institutions that will take them. For example, I am trying to organize the event locally to give to the Women's Resource Center. Others are giving to the Salvation Army, local women's shelters, and even some food banks will take it and distribute. Go here to see the original post.
http://www.chachingonashoestring.com/2010/05/02/couponing-for-community-what-will-you-give/

Will you participate with me?

God Bless!
One Christian Mom

Not Much Time

2010-05-02T09:11:00.002-04:00

It seems every so often, Real Life gets in the way of computer life :) Apparently it's that time again. Sorry this blog has been lagging. On top of trying to get my kids to eat, back and forth with various doctors, etc., my friends and family have been asking me to teach them how to save money, so I have developed a class and have been teaching it in various locations, and on the internet. People really seem to need it now more than ever, and I have become quite established at not spending money :) Anyway, that's why I haven't been on here lately.

BTW - funny side note (this can ONLY be God.) The message this week at church? Becoming debt free for the kingdom!

With God's Love
One Christian Mom